I'd become entangled in the most defective yet addicting relationship I've ever experienced, chasing endorphins but catching only pain, anger, insomnia, CPTSD. You taught me the ways in which so many women manipulate, how they can straight up lie through their teeth to save their asses despite your meaty-hard-evidence having just choked them in broad daylight. It took me a while to see the big picture, map out exactly what she was doing, systematically grinding me down to a nubbin with incessant nagging, restriction, an endless barrage of deceit. You installed some sense and the titanium spine I'd need to tear her games to shreds. I watched her effortlessly hamster up a fresh batch of bullshit about a date I'd peeped her organising that "absolutely did not happen! I mean, really... would I ever really do that?". It'd clicked, time to stop fighting for the nothing that we had, get up and walk away. I deleted and blocked everything, never went back. Eight months of freedom from it all, bar the occasional unprovoked psychotic message from new phone numbers. Ignore. Block. Dead to me.

To the newbies / those who have not yet supped at the teat of reason, it's bitter but gets sweeter, if you think things won't happen to you because you're unique or smart or handsome, you're wrong, so time to stare reality's pig-ugliness down and take a stab or two at the fact that throughout your life some women will plan and execute the rape and murder of your sense of worth, your hopes, your dreams. Tie you down and let you suffer a covertly planned pregnancy, a grand-old trip to the abortion clinic because god damn you just aren't quite great enough, a smattering of social climbing and monkey branching, another man's kid cooked up for you to raise, a pinch of divorce rape and "they're MY kids and you'll see them WHEN I SAY!... and keep that money coming" up in your nightmares. Tasty. Oh, and it can be hard to differentiate between kinda bad ideas, and the holy shit what was I thinkings. Even 'good' women (hahahahaha) sour as they age (badly beyond 27 or so). And tits and ass muddy your mind no matter how smart you think you are, never, EVER, stick your dick in crazy, even if they fuck like a dream and let you do anything you damn well like. They'll burn you up, maybe literally.

Once you start to realise what's what, neither your beloved significant others of past or present, nor dating apps or dating scene in general will ever look the same again! Dodge those bullets. Save yourself a hell of a lot of hell, whether you continue to get your dick wet or not. Stay safe, be sensible, and don't let the animal part of your brain rule you