This is the shit that makes me go back to being a simp. The idealization. I believe in AWALT. Yet the excuses and ideas comes back regardless. All because my friend and his wife come to hang out. She is so pretty and funny. And he doesn't give her the attention that I would. Disgusting simp behavior of me. I realize I should stop seeing them but they're the only friends I have. They give me something to do when I have nothing else.

Now look. I'm a happy chap. No worries in life. I don't go seeking validation or any shit online. I focus on myself and know deep down I am my best self alone. But when I see her, I get all emotional. Fuck this shit man. I hate it. I don't even want a woman. I think about all the bullshit and the baggage they bring. But then I idealize her and think about how pretty she is and how I just wanna hold her. Stupid gay shit...

If you have seen the movie 50 Days of Summer. I swear. That BS. Me and him are alike.