I had been a long time lurker of this subreddit throughout my college years as a blue pill idealist with a closed mind. Like many people, I thought that this was a place for men to spout vitriolic statements and hate on women. However, the key trait that set me apart was my curiosity. Regardless of whether I agreed or not, I was still interested in reading the perspectives people had on certain issues so I continued to read this sub at slight low moments in my life when a girlfriend had just left me or if I was going through a stressful time with a girlfriend.

As closed minded as I was in my BP phase, I still read through some of the articles and started to slowly question my beliefs. The path for my conversion to believing in TRP was set for me: It was a build up of 5 failed relationships, lots of wasted time catering to girlfriends, and one particular young woman who I should now thank for cheating on me and "ruining" my life. She was the catalyst for my buy-in. Her behavior in the year and a half we dated hit almost every aspect of AWALT in the worst ways. In retrospect, experiencing her and getting over her felt like a crash course of Unplugging 101: From BP to TRP.

At my lowest emotional point post-breakup, I remembered TRP and spent nights alone religiously reading the sidebar with conviction. She was the kick start I needed to immerse myself in TRP and solidify my thoughts about intergender dynamics. One of the most important books on my window sill shelf is Rollo Tomassi's The Rational Male.

The key thing I realized when I started to dig into these readings was that I was able to score long term relationships with HB7's - HB9's most of my life because of my behavior when I was single. I was aloof, I was playing the field and seeing multiple girls, I lifted more, didn't compromise my schedule, and I had abundance, which allowed me to hook up with and average of 3 to 4 girls every time I was broken up with (but I always ended up in another relationship by the end of a semester).

Contrary to this, when I was in relationships... well... you all know the deal... I crashed and burned by changing the way I behaved from single to relationship, and was confused as to why shit hit the fan when the girls left me or cheated on me. The pure emotional toll of that loss when you're BP takes a lot out of a guy before he unplugs (if he unplugs).

At first, I was bitter like everyone else when they reach the anger phase: I hated rather than understood the whole picture. I closed myself off from thinking that there was anything redeemable about women other than being a hole to fill. I lifted harder than ever, re-established my routine, earned a certification for my job, established stronger relationships with my guy friends, got myself a plate, dated around, and I generally made an effort to experience/ learn something new every day.

But the more I read and the more introspection I put into the readings on the sidebar, I whittled away at my anger and came to a point of epiphany: it's nature. The way women behave at an intergender standpoint and who they choose to give their commitment to is not a choice. Attraction is not a choice. I was angry at the phrase "She's not yours, it's just your turn," but the more I shifted my focus from deriving happiness out of relationships to deriving happiness out of my own self and endeavors, I was able to fully unplug. This must have been good fraction of what Siddhartha Gautama felt under the Bodhi Tree when he reached enlightenment. I was no longer angry or bitter: I was happy with the realization that failed relationships were my fault.

If something is your fault, you can fix it. Anything else is out of your hands is dictated by nature

Something I think people do not do these days is take a step back and evaluate things. We live in a society that caters to instant gratification, so we don't stop to think about what happened to us or predict what will happen with a clear lens. Here, we switch out our rose colored glasses with red ones and choose to remain adamant about our opinions about something. People that were once BP trying to go full on RP tend to do this as an over-correction and it's not healthy when you remain stuck in anger phase. It's great for early gains and personal growth, but once the anger is over, you need something to keep you on the path.

I have seen a lot of great, perspective shattering posts that have altered the way I view things through the sidebar material and individuals posts, but I have also seen my fair share of closed minded posts throughout my time here in TRP. The one thing that stuck out to me as an example was a conversation on how universities were pushing women's studies classes as a prerequisite. Lots of guys here did not like that people had to take a "useless" course these days, but I think it's great that you have to. Taken with the right perspective and TRP teachings, taking a women's studies course would be like taking a lab and experiencing first hand how the hamstering among women and BP cucks in the classroom debate translate into societal changes and why women today operate the way they do.

To some, a women's studies course has no inherent value. From my perspective, it has a TON. I never had to take an official course during my undergraduate tenure, but I had my time running with the feminists, read their books, and actually believed in the third wave. After unplugging, I see the value in those experiences as they are things I can reflect back on to serve as reminders on why ex girlfriends act/acted a certain way and how I should act to achieve some desired result. I was able to complete the picture of AWALT by actually being there and listening to what these self righteous women had to hamster and just how they are optimizing their strategies unknowingly applying a dual mating strategy. Firsthand examples of hypergamy, AF/BB, how being attractive lets you get away with anything while BP boys get shit on, etc all made complete sense. It also allowed me to get to know myself better and finally embrace the guy I had always been sans relationship.

Sun Tzu once stipulated:

If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

Everything came full circle. My anger and frustration were satiated by the knowledge gained and hindsight that was only achievable through having those experiences. I apply this now to every aspect. If I don't like someone's opinion or actions, I will put myself in front of people just like that person to see why they think the way they do. This allows me to change my perspective, reinforce TRP teachings, and be better able to handle those kinds of people in the future.

And on that note, I urge everyone here that is genuinely trying to make their lives better or those that may be confused/ new to the sub to just go out there and experience new things. Routines are great for the weekdays when you have school/work/fitness goals/ business goals/etc, but what we often fail to do is diversify our experiences. I have learned the most about my character by exposing myself to things I had never done or even wanted to do. Most times I found that the things I never even tried doing are the things I disliked, so I went out and tried it. More often than not, my dislike for those things go away (except for durians... durians are really disgusting and I am almost positive that people must have different kinds of taste buds to enjoy eating them). The key is to be curious and to explore. Eventually, those experiences will add up into an IDGAF attitude since you will have faced many people, many situations, and learn many things outside of your own comfort zone that very few things will phase you.

To close out, I'm gonna quote Sun Tzu again, and I hope this resonates with ya'll:

"Hence the experienced soldier, once in motion, is never bewildered; once he has broken camp, he is never at a loss."

Invest in yourself by lifting, build self confidence by loving yourself, and refine your perspective by experiencing. These will all go into building your frame.

TL;DR: If you expose yourself to all sorts of experiences, your frame gets built along on top of it. Our frame is most shaken when we are introduced something we have never experienced before. This is life's macro version of throwing shit tests out at you. We need to get out of our comfort zones and see firsthand what different things and different people are like to develop an unwavering frame.