A Girl who tried to sexually assault me at uni is now a leading activist in women’s rights and empowerment. I’m a guy. The hypocrisy makes me feel nauseous and I’m not sure if I’m stupid for letting it get to me.

Didn’t know where to post this. Sorry if it’s the wrong place. I just wanted to get it off my chest in a way.

At uni years ago, I lived in a big house share at the top of the house. One night I was asleep and awoke to some noise coming into my room. It was the sound of one of my female flat mates that also lived on the top floor. She had just got home from a drunken night out. She was completely all over the place. She was whispering for me to wake up. I was still half asleep and expected her just to leave. Next thing I know I realised my blanket had been removed from on top of me.

She had grabbed my penis and was attempting to give me a blow job. I pushed her away. She kept coming back and grabbing at my penis. She was quite forceful and aggressive and kept begging me to please let her suck me of.

I was really grossed out by the situation. And by the fact that this girl always tried to give off an air of superiority of moral ethics over everyone else. And yet here she was trying to force herself on me sexually. I managed to get her off and out of my room. At which point a few minutes later I could hear her snoring loudly in her room which was across the hall. She snores extremely loudly.

I never really thought about it much after. It was never mentioned. I was so embarrassed by what had happened. And I never knew whether she was too drunk to remember. Years have passed. We lost touch. She was very toxic and I distanced myself. Only to then discover she is now a leading female empowerment activist for refugees and minorities. And gives talks on all of this. It makes me sick to think of what she did to me. And here she is now talking out against the exact type of things she is guilty of trying to do herself.

If a guy had done this to a girl at uni they would have been kicked out most likely. I can’t help but think if I had said anything no one would have believed me especially as it was a number of years ago now. But seeing her now trying to come across as this saviour of morality makes me feel nauseas. I feel frustrated that I still find it difficult to move on and just forget about it. I know if I ever confronted her maybe for some weird kind of closure or something, she would just deny it.

I’m not sure how to feel about this and i think that’s why I’m writing. If I am over blowing feeling this way and I should just man up then please tell me. I just want to not feel such resentment as it’s bringing me down. But I don’t know how to.

Thank you for reading.

Edit: i really only expected a few replies, so this has overwhelmed me. I haven’t been able to thank everyone but I really appreciate all the replies. The funny thing is, this thread has been cathartic and almost helped to give me some kind of closure in a way which I never expected. Thanks so much for taking the time to reply.