**Introduction:**

Framing seems to have multiple interpretations in this forum so I want to set the record straight for others to better understand how to use it in their favor. In this discussion, I will go over the importance of framing, what a frame is exactly, examples, how to use a frame, and how to change a frame.

In meeting anyone the context/environment will heavily determine how the interaction will go. A woman will have vastly different rubrics for judging men, based on the environment the woman is in (dance club/class/online dating). This can work in your favor or not depending on the context. Being good with people is knowing when, where and what frame will be in your favor and how to change a frame if this is not true.

What is a Frame?

A frame is everything around the focus of an interaction. If you are conversing with someone, everything outside of the conversation’s subject is the frame. Here is a non-exclusive list of some things that might be in a frame.

1) The rubric that you will be judged on and what you can judge other’s on.

2) Presented and unpresented options you have in a moment.

3) True or false impressions that others have on you before a moment.

4) The narrative of others (their history/background/goals/intentions)

5) Your own narrative.

An Example of a Frame.

Now this list is very vague, so let me give an example. I will give a focus and go through how each point on this list can affect the frame and thus affect the meaning of the focus given.

Imagine that the focus is a man lighting a cigarette in front of a girl.

1) The rubric that you will be judged on and what you can judge other’s on. How will the rubric she will be judging you on affect the frame? Like I mentioned, the rubric a woman will judge a man on will depend on the environment the man is in. If this man were lighting a cigarette in a non-smoking dance club, the meaning of this interaction would be different than if they were outside where smoking was allowed. The girl would negatively judge a guy who gets kick out of a club for pulling out a cigarette like an idiot. That same girl would probably be more tolerate or even judge positively if that man pulled out a cigarette outside of that club.

2)Presented and unpresented options you have in a moment. How will the options you have affect the frame? While you are smoking as the man, the obvious opinion is whether to offer her a cigarette or not. This would be the presented opinion. The less obvious opinions would be HOW are you going to offer/reject her the cigarette. Would you wait for her to ask? Would you first ask her if she smokes, and then offer her a cigarette if she does? Would you first acknowledge that smoking is awful for your health, and then offer as a joke? If you don’t want to give her a cigarette, how would you reject her if she asked? Will you say it is because you don’t have enough? Will you say it’s because smoking is bad for your health? These different timelines are a part of the frame and if you don’t want her to ask you for a cigarette, then you probably shouldn’t have lit one for yourself with her nearby. By lighting a cigarette, you are establishing a precedent for her to ask. You basically setting up a frame for her to ask you for a cigarette, which is smart if this is what you have intended.

3) True or false impressions that others have on you before a moment. How will the girl’s previous impressions of you affect the frame? If her impression of you was that you a healthy and prude individual, she may be surprised that you smoke. Lighting a cigarette could be a subtle way of telling her that you’re more casual.

4) The narrative of others judging you (their history/background/goals/intentions). How will the girl’s own narrative affect the frame? This girl may have had a friend who died of cancer from smoking. In which case, she won’t think of your smoking as a positive thing. She may be a smoker herself, in which case she might be relieved that she can ask you for a cigarette. She may be trying to quit smoking; in which case, she might just walk away from you to subdue the temptation.

5) Your own narrative. How will your own narrative affect the frame? This aspect get more introspective. Why are you lighting the cigarette? Are you doing this to impress her? In this case, you are acting very beta male by trying to be someone else to impress a girl. If you are doing this because you don’t care about what society thinks as healthy, then you are displaying a rebellious side that some people may find attractive. Are you doing this because it feels good? People may find self-indulgent behaviors as comforting because they to have their own self-indulgent behaviors. People in the red pill like to gloss over their own narrative when talking about frame but it is important since it will subconsciously determine the tone and body language you will have. The narrative you have will subconsciously affect how you pull out the cigarette, how you will light it, and how you will offer her one if you do. Most people don’t see these small indications but they can be seen in other’s if you look closely.

Now hopefully I broke down what a frame is in this very small moment that is a man simply pulling out a cigarette. Whether you pull off smoking as an alpha male is mostly due to the frame you’re in. Check out these examples and determine for yourself what is the frame. Don’t focus on the smoking, analyze the frame the guy is smoking in. Go through the list presented and determine how each point on the list affects the frame. After analyzing the frame, judge whether if this makes the man smoking alpha or not.

Examples of guys smoking

Observations on Building Frames with Others

Now that we have a solid understanding of what frame is, we can talk about improving the frame. The first observation is that the more people that are in your frame, the stronger your frame will be. It will be harder for a girl to break your frame if you made it with your friends. If you want to better communicate with other, you must make a frame together. I’ve noticed that some people on the red pill think that maintaining frame means “sticking to your guns and maintain your boundaries”. Maintaining boundaries is important to your own narrative but it’s only a piece of the frame. It is not enough to build a frame with someone else. The frame you build with others must have your personal boundaries, other people boundaries and the other points that were made on the list. Think of building a frame with someone else like making a scene in a movie. Some of the best people at framing are improv comedians because they know how to make a scene and a character on the spot with a cinematic and interesting frame that can attract girls. Try learning about improv if you want to learn about framing.

It takes practice and time to know how to build frames and the best way to learn is by analyzing frames yourself. You may build a frame with a girl only to find that she accidently or on purpose destroys it. You must analyze her new frame using the list given and then transition into a new frame using your friends, asking leading questions, or by acting out of her frame. You could also just leave her and find another girl to build a frame with. Either way if you are not comfortable or don’t like a frame someone built with you, don’t stay in it. Some girls are very good at framing and they will intentionally put you into a frame that you cannot simply walk away from or change. She may ask leading questions that may seem innocent at first, may lead you into a bad frame. These kinds of shit tests are difficult to predict and having friends to help you out can be a live saver.

TLDR: You can build a new frame with a girl to include your narrative, her narrative, and the surroundings by taking advantage of the presented and unpresented opinions you have in the current frame. Building frames can build rapport and communicate impressions that make you look higher value. You can strengthen your frame by using your friends or social norms.