I was force-fed the red pill about reltionships, women, and dating about two years ago after me and my only LTR broke up. Since then, I've known the pill was there regarding life as a whole, but always made excuses for myself not to swallow it.

That changes today.

Over the past two years, my mental health has been deteriorating. I finally hit rock bottom by checking myself into the psych ward of a military hospital because my suicidal ideations had gotten to the point of overwhelming me. My poor mental health has led to me getting in trouble and ruining my career, as well as my future civilian life, as I'm possibly facing an other than honorable discharge.

I'm not making excuses for myself. It's my fault for not taking the pill earlier, which probably could have prevented the decline of my mental health.

I've quit working out over the past months, and over the past two years I have given up on women as a result of the baggage left after my LTR. I haven't been very active in anything and my quality of life has declined in correspondance with my mental health, creating a big cycle of wanting to kill myself. I've dealt with body image issues, and my self confidence as a person, leading to my lack of trying with women to an even further extent.

Starting today, I'm changing that shit. I'm getting rid of my TV and playstation, and everything out of my room. I'll only be in my room to sleep and study, instead of being here all day every day. I'm getting a membership at a rock climbing gym, and am going to start lifting and eating right again, I'm cutting off my fucking hair, getting new glasses, working further on my body image and starting over. I'm going to start doing BJJ again, and am going to start running, as well as actually getting out in my city and doing things with my friends. I'm going to keep myself extremely active and start working on my inner game and start meeting women and new friends through these channels. Through these things, I'll start working on my body image issues and start having more success with women.

I'm getting out of the military, even if it has to be with an OTH discharge, that is better than staying in for the next three years and it possibly leading to my suicide or further deterioration of my life.

I'm looking into careers. Right now I'm looking into being a rope access welder (was a welder before the army), a pilot, or going to law school. If anyone has anything else to look into, or advice on any of these let me know.

I'm finally taking responsibility for my life and mental health. My sister told me to stop playing the fucking victim, and she's exactly right. It ends today, and my new, awesome life starts. A year or two from today, ill be ripped with a high SMV amd women to choose from, with a defined life path and a good career on the horizon.

TRP has probably saved my life at this point, if I didn't make the decision to turn my kife around today I don't know that I'd be alive in 5 years. So thank you to this sub.

I'm only posting this here so i have something to look back on to keep me accountable, that other people have seen as well, so if I don't do it, I'm not only lying to myself.

Any advice, please let me know.