Ever since i discovered i could go my own way, i now sit back and think about how blue pilled i was in the past. I used considerable resources and time doing women favors. in campus i was the free tech consultant, since i was on reddit too i knew where to get things like books and movies... my outbox is full of novels and text books that i downloaded and sent to women mostly, people would leave me their malware ridden laptops over the weekend and i would fix them, i had a girlfriend at the time, so i wasn't even doing it to get laid, i was just a stupid idiot who thought that women are special and deserve favors. i was too stupid to realize i was being used, i started noticing i was being a moron when i had spinal issues and i couldn't walk and not one, just one of my female 'friends' even visited me, sent a card or even wrote on Facebook, they were clearly 'friends' with me because of what i could do for them. while i sorta let myself become the person you request books or stuff from or do free IT work, the blame is wholeheartedly on my side for being a moron and allowing myself to be used, I'm not even angry or think i deserve their gratitude or anything, which is why i cringe at my actions now that i have realized how useless and pointless women are. All that time i wasted waiting for large downloads (i am from a 3rd world country, fast internet is hard to come by). all that time i wasted converting ebooks to pdf or making bootable linux usbs to fix malware ridden computers, so much time wasted... i wish i could kick myself... i am so lucky i met you guys before i went ahead and wasted my life trapped in a marriage.