Ok the situation. I am a black male that grew up in NYC and moved to the west coast. I do okay. I have a nice condo (I rent) and stay away from females (mostly). I planned to purchase a home on my own in a few years and have a few pennies saved.

This week everything changed. My grandmother and I have always been on good terms, and she's the one family member that calls long distance regularly when I forget to. I pay her phone bill, bought her 2 laptops and I am trying to get her internet. My mom died when I was young.

Now, my uncle is as old as dirt and just had 2 boys with an old ass ghetto chick. She's a welfare, section 8, project dwelling, money-grubbing, high yellow hoochie mama queen-wasteful and controlling. Well my grandma wants nothing to do with her (and rightfully so).

So here it is. My grandma's up in age and wants to leave New York forever. I told her "hey, they're s always room at my house for you, even if I have to get a bigger place. Just tell me when you're at the airport and I'll come get you." And I meant it. Of all the people in this world with it's ups and downs, My grandmother has been my ace. We fought in the past, but now we're cool.

So she asks me about getting a house. I say I'm working on it. She says she want's to help. She's put some money away. I tell her she doesn't have to. She insists on helping.

It's enough money to put a down payment on a 4 bedroom house. Today.

She flat out tells me. She's getting old. She may die soon. She doesn't want the vultures rifling through her stuff and stealing everything and I get nothing. I told her, I don't want her money, I want my grandma. Over time she has gotten me to understand that though I care little about my grandmother's money, other family members will gladly drive a bus over me to get it.

She says she doesn't want all she's done wasted and destroyed, and wants to give me the money on one caveat. That I save a space for her in my new house. I told here she was crazy for buying me a house and insisting to live in just a corner of it.

I know this might seem like brag-splaining, so real problems ahead, and I only thought to talk about this to MGTOW because this has been the biggest gathering of truth seeing, truth talking, and sometimes understanding men anywhere. And I don't have anyone in my life I can trust enough to tell this to in person, and have them respond in an unbaised, non-selfish opinion.

TLDR; Ok, here are my problems (it's time for the meat and potatoes)

  1. I have to watch my grandmother die. I keep flip-flopping from Honor, to sadness, to gladness at the though of her coming out, and then back again. The two people I did tell have such bigger problems, that this seems like a spec of sand in their food. So I stopped talking. But we don't all live forever. But I will have to be there in the end, and my mother is already dead and father long gone too.

  2. I feel like I am second base, but a blessed second base. If my uncle wasn't such a sucker being led around by his cock at age whatever, he would have been in my place. So the grace I feel with this development is tempered by me feeling second string.

  3. I will be the first in our family with real roots. I don't know If I can do it. I've been taking it too easy as a MGTOW the last 3 years working only when I need to. I got soft and weak. I did the math and the new house represents a 13-15% uptake in working for the rest of my life, grounds me to the area and make me want to spend time mastering new job skills instead of focusing on creation which has a bigger outcome, but I haven't even got started on either.

  4. She keeps mentioning marriage. I am not married and have no kids and she is under no qualms that I think all these girls out here are shit. I have recounted countless stories over the years of modern dating life. The terrible women that exist now, and that I am on to all their tricks and can't be fooled. She respects it, or seems to respect my strength in that area. She chides my uncle for falling for it penis first. But she always throws in marriage in a sentence when its about houses.

  5. I have to pick a house that my grandma can live in. She walks fine now, but what if that changes? all the newer houses are cookie cutter and they go up (stairs, etc). All the old houses that I don't trust are 1st level. I want a house I'd be proud to go to work to pay for, not that would feel like an unneeded burden with space I wont use or care about.

  6. This would be the first house in my family since my father sold our house in NYC (while we still lived in it) for $22,000 and ran off with his other family (That same house is worth 1.6 mil today). This would be a start. I would be the first. I would be my family's anchor in the future, which would be great, except I don't have a family.

So there you have it all. Can anyone help/point out something I'm not seeing, maybe give me a new perspective?

I've been alone so long, that this seems both exciting (to have family nearby finally), and grim (I have to watch her die).

I would do all this for free. I would take care of my grandmother till her dying day and never ask for a penny. Why do people always have to put money into things?

I also had dreams of leaving this place (America) and living outside the country or whatever. I told her. She said just sell the house.

Any takers?