Message I got from my mom, when I asked her to remind me about what was wrong about my ex:

Almost everything was wrong. But as time goes on we tend to forget. You and Carroll did not share the same views on anything. In addition, she snapped her fingers a lot and wanted you to jump. Plus all the guilt trips, making you feel like everything was your fault. That is the #1 tactic listed in a disfunctional relationship check off list.

Carroll never looked at her part in anything. It was always about what you were doing wrong....ultimately that will destroy a person. You were very broken son....it has taken months for you to see the vistas in your life. Using guilt tactics is a complete form of control used by people who insist on getting their own way. Just saying....and you can look this all up online.