So my friend is going through the longest divorce in human history, i think it outlasted their marriage by now... They have racked up lawyer fees over stupid shit over & over. They are both somewhat petty about everything but she's milking the system for every drop. I've been observing from the side lines asking the same question: "Why can't you finalize the divorce?"

Because she filled for divorce first! Gentlemen, it puts her in the drivers seat. The law in Canada is very cruel in this fashion & you almost never hear about this in the forums or in the news. You have to live through it or know someone who has been thrown around by the court system long enough to break it down for you.

Here are some examples: 1) When she wants something signed, she can force the issue immediately. If you don't make an effort to meet at her specific timing in court, you are considered in contempt of court & can go to jail. When the situation is reversed, because she filled first she can give any amount of excuses and delay the process as long as she desires. She doesn't even need to show up to court, only send her lawyer, sometimes the lawyer also plays games, giving their own excuses for not being a convenient time. Meanwhile you have to lose work & lose money on your own lawyer because you have to be there or your fucked.

2) When you combine this with the fact that divorce courts favor women, the only real way to fight the system as a man is to crawl up it's asshole and fight it from the inside. Meaning you have to file divorce before she does & hope the one sided court system respects it's own rules. Maybe this works, but who actually knows anyone in that 20% of divorces issued by men? Why would men want to cut off their own balls?

3) When it comes to custody, if you don't deliver the child over immediately at a predetermined time, she can call the cops and you are taken to jail. She however, can bend the rules to her liking at any time without consent from my friend.

4) Taking a child oversees? In Canada you need signature from both parents. My friend works in construction, so he only gets the construction holidays (2 weeks), guess what? The judges don't give a shit about your restrictive holidays, they divide the vacation time with the child in half & guess who has priority? The woman who filled first.

5) In canada, the child must sleep under the same roof as the parent. If at any time my friend leaves his child with his parents due to a late night work issue & the ex-wife finds out - he's fucked. meanwhile she leaves the kid alone with her sisters/brothers sometimes for entire weekends while she goes fuck chad somewhere.

All this to say - never get married. You might get lucky and catch someone wanting a clean break, but it takes very little to start down a bitter, long annoying path that will turn you into a souless tool.