This is my first Reddit post and I'm glad I am able to share it with you guys. I am a 20 yr old college student (black if it matters) and recently I have decided to take the red pill. This might be a lengthy read do I apologize in advance for it.

Around this time last year I was in an off and on relationship with someone who I thought was "the one". During the time I spent with her I put up with things I should not have. I really thought this was "love" but looking at what happened I could not have been more wrong.

Anyway it was a mostly long-distance relationship (she worked a few hours from me) but we both took turns seeing the other. We spent the majority of our free time talking to each other through FaceTime. I met her on social media. At the time, I thought she was the most amazing person ever. We liked the same things, we listened to the same music, and most importantly she gave me something most women have never given me before: validation.

Before I met her, I would never give women the chance to commit with me. I would get what I want from them and move onto the next one. However, I felt really empty in doing so. This is where it gets interesting. After our first hookup she was really confused with what she wanted with me. At this time I didn't want to put up with any of her games so I started flirting around with other women and she ended up feeling bad about it. Long story short we ended up getting together.

Now after we both established our feelings towards each other we appeared to get closer. We both made the effort to see each other more frequently. However, after one night we spent together it felt off. She became really distant and she told me I was moving too fast with her. At this time I was really confused and I had no idea where any of this was coming from. She insisted that we take a break but she ended up getting upset when I suggested that I could do single things. This resulted in us fighting for months.

Fast forward a few months: we haven't seen each other in months yet she insists she still cares for me. There always seemed to be an excuse to why she can't see me or why I shouldn't see her. She would also flirt around and tell me it was not serious (yeah right) and like any other fool I believed her. It wasn't until later that we agreed to see each other.

The time I spent with her was amazing. I could actually see myself spending the rest of my life with this woman. We (foolishly) talked about moving in and where we would stay. It was almost too perfect.

Shortly after, we stared to fight more and more and at this point I was tired of it all. I finally put my foot down. We broke it off but the first month was hard for the both of us. Even though we were not together we still leaned on each other for emotional support. However, she was not there for me when I thought I needed her and I ended up developing a better understanding of who I am as a man, and what I will not tolerate.

I'm going to wrap it up by saying she ended up getting in a relationship with a "friend" she told me not to worry about when we first started dating. She insisted that she would not get in another relationship after we ended things. Although at this point I feel as if we don't owe each other anything I felt betrayed. I gave her everything but I rarely got anything in return. I was so afraid of losing her I became comfortable with losing myself. Everything she told me was a lie and she tried her hardest to make me feel as if I'm a villain. To this day she tries to throw dirt on my name when I've only been concerned with improving myself. I definitely dodged a bullet and I'm glad this happened to me. I can now acknowledge the red flags instead of ignoring them and more importantly I won't allow anyone to control my happiness. Thank you for those who stuck around.

TLDR: Encountered my first "love", ended up putting up with things I shouldn't have and I ignored red flags. I finally washed my hands with her and I'm on the road to improving myself.