Discovering MGTOW, advice?

carjackerwilly · 2016-10-12T23:48:14+00:00

Being 22 is a difficult age for you to get your head around this. With maturity you understand that you are the only one who determines your value and worth. Your happiness relies on you only. Other people's perceptions of you are meaningless. If you seek validation and approval from others then you can never be free. Take pride in yourself, be honest with yourself and live the life that you want, not what others push on you. If people don't get it or won't accept it, get rid of them. A MGTOW at 22, the world is your oyster my friend. Walk tall.

tribalbandit · 2016-10-12T23:50:06+00:00

You need to address why you feel like a loser. Do not blame any of this on the age you grew up in, that women are the most entitled bitches that have been seen in a long time. While true if you allow these things to be your focus you will always be a loser. You will always be that which you believe about yourself.

Why do you give others the power to determine for you how you should live your life?

Are they in your shoes when your soul cries out in pain?

Are they the ones who are responsible for when you do something kind for another. Not because you expected a reward, but because you felt like making someone elses day better.

Look kid, you have to understand no one will ever value you more than you do. I know it is hard to accept. But no one else can know your pain. No one else can understand your triumphs. We are always alone and you are doing what so many do. Thinking if you can just meet the groups expectations, you suddenly will have that connection and that loneliness you feel will go away.

It never does. We are always alone, even in a crowd. When we close our eyes, none of the others are there with us in our thoughts, shielding us from our truthful stare of our shortcomings to triumphs. You need to break free of the shackles other put you in. Give yourself permission to be you and know it is ok. It has to be. None of the rest of us can make your decisions for you. That is the closest to peace you will ever feel. Knowing that you are not an immortal being who understands everything. That when you make a choice, you did so because you knew it was right (not for me, not for your mom, for you).

Good luck man. I hope you weather the storm you have walked into. Congrats on having the strength to take those first steps.

Paladin2903 · 2016-10-13T05:38:46+00:00

22 is a tough Age, nowadays. It's basically like being a kid -- no offense to you at all. All ages are at least 6-8 years behind, in terms of maturing.

That's just the way the world is now. I'm 32 (still young enough), but I discovered all of this at 29, and it was all pretty devastating -- not gonna lie.

You're young and unenlightened (again, no offense at all), so you still put your value in what your peers (and women) think of you.

My best advice is to continue studying, get that third eye open, go down the rabbit hole (slowly -- it's rather endless), and eventually you'll get to a point where you realize that YOU determine your value, not other people.

You know yourself best -- what you like, what you need, etc. If someone says you have no game, just throw a zinger back at them. Just say that real men don't need game....they do what they want, determine their own value, and aren't little bitch puppies to women. That'll usually get them to shut up, quickly.

coqui25 · 2016-10-13T02:33:01+00:00

I feel you bro. I was mgtow at your age, and it was not easy. I focused in staying busy with work and school. I also studied abroad and partied hard while abroad.

Also, spend time with your friends. If they bitch, ignore it. When it happens to them, they will respect you.

Also, do understand that if you feel this way, I am 100% sure others feel the same way.

coryandtrevorforever · 2016-10-13T04:12:10+00:00

I hear where you're coming from. I remember being 22 and walking home in the wee hours of the morning after striking out at the bar and feeling like a serious loser because of it. Gradually I began to realize that the whole thing, the bars, the beer, the looking for women to try to get with, none of it made me feel good. All I ever really got for the time and money spent was a hangover. I'm almost 36 now, and I can say that being MGTOW gets a lot easier after 30 when your sex drive starts to drop off.

Quinnjamin2113 · 2016-10-13T04:47:15+00:00

Thank you for the advice, also, after re-reading my post I noticed there was a lot of typos so sorry about that. But yeah I think my plan as of now would just be to focus on becoming as successful in life as I can. (not only financially, but morally, and psrsonally) I will try to focus more on small successes and making as many right choices as I can so they can add up, instead of worry about the bigger picture. I think perhaps as I practice as much self control as I can, and try to do right by myself and others as much as possible, I will start to feel better, or at least distract myself while I age and get out of my early 20's. I think it all does come back to me not feeling proud of myself and who I am. Mostly because I don't even know who I am, what I'm good at, or who I want to be. And so far when I try to figure out the answers to these questions, other people and influences get in the way, and I allow them to. I need to start to try to get a picture of who and what I want to be at say, 30 or 40, and before I make any shirt of decisions, ask myself whether they get me closer to that goal. The challenging part is forming that picture. And it has been difficult to motivate myself into putting effort in.

illegal_toothpaste · 2016-10-13T08:57:08+00:00

20s is awesome. the women are hot and easy. is say fuck em until they hit the wall and they get all demanding.

mgtowmathers · 2016-10-13T15:44:10+00:00

You can come here for solidarity brother. As you can see from men who have live twice and three times your age, women aren't worth the trouble.

slappydapussy · 2016-10-13T21:13:32+00:00

My advice: Accept that society will brand you a loser.

Accept that people will think poorely of you.

Accept that you're a man and not a pussy.

Now act like a man and don't give a shit or give in no matter what anyone says. Do what you think you should do and for the right reasons.

With that said if you're just now waking up you have a lot of learning to do. Here is my advice on that:

Drop everything you think you know. You don't know it. Now, with an open mind(curious and more skeptical of yourself and friends than your enemies) research everything before you develop fixed beliefs about them. You'll forget the exact reasons for a lot of the stuff you decide on and this is natural. But you can trust that you researched it with an open mind.

Good luck.

iSniffles · 2016-10-14T01:44:40+00:00

Hey there, I'm 22 as well, and though not completely new, MGTOW is a fairly recent addition to my life. I really like what the others in this thread said. Basically, you have to turn your measurement stick for success inward (internal validation), instead of outwards (external validation) - which is a thing I'm still trying to get down myself. It's not a simple, but a slow and gradual change to implement.

Tbh, I'm still a virgin and pretty upfront about it. I learned that I don't need to hide that fact, as it is a piece of my identity. And if subjected to ridicule, just look for people who accept you. Don't tolerate assholes. But people in general, never really gave me negative comments about it. (But women in general don't really seem to think highly of you because of it, since you're missing the, what I like to call, "Seal of Approval" in their mind.)

Also, the label "loser" hurts only as much, as you let it hurt you. Don't take their shit, you know what you're worth to yourself! Also, if your friends call you a loser in a disrespectful way, confront them, if they don't stop, you need to get better friends.

On this subject, I highly recommend Turd Flinging Monkey's videos on youtube, (Linked in the sidebar) especially "She will never love you" along with... almost every video of his. - I think it's easier to let go of the notion of needing a GF to be accepted, complete, whatever you may call it, if you realize how forfeit your efforts really are. If you start to understand female and male nature respectively, the puzzle almost completes itself.

And you'll be going your own way.

On a side note: Taking the red pill, really hits hard. For me, it was losing the purpose of my life: Getting a good job, be a good husband and father, having an honest, loving and loyal wife, living a happy family life and being a virtuous, respected and just man - all illusions. Losing one's purpose is hard to cope with, this is where the "Redpill Rage" comes from. It's perfectly normal to have that reaction, just don't linger in the "Anger Phase". From then on you must find a new purpose, and with it, rise from the ashes a new man. Anyway, Good Luck!

oldredder · 2016-10-14T08:14:51+00:00

You have to create value in what you do - making money, making yourself smarter, stronger, whatever - and not regard women as having value unless they can do the same alone and/or for you (which they won't, but you need to learn this the slow, hard way).

Also you should regard everyone else's opinion as zero value, pretty much, all the time, which you can do once you can prove by your own accomplishments you know better.

Quinnjamin2113 · 2016-10-14T15:46:13+00:00

Thanks guys, I really appreciate it. As for research, besides that monkey guy, what is some more academic research I can look at? I place a high value on knowledge. I dropped out of high school my sophomore year so I could skip straight to college at 16. And I spend much of my time researching politics, economics, and ancient religion.. What scientists/studies/websites can I find information I need on. (perhaps a scientific, male, and actually factual version of jezebel? Lol) I am not a Virgin, as at high school age i was usually the one taking a lot girls virginities in my small rural town in Illinois. I have since moved out of my parents house to Chicago, which is where my doom has taken place and I have learned not to place value in women, as women don't place value in me.

Title	Discovering MGTOW, advice?
Author	Quinnjamin2113
Upvotes	9
Comments	12
Date	October 12, 2016 6:56 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/575t9b/discovering_mgtow_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/discovering-mgtow-advice.617859 https://theredarchive.com/post/617859

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