Honestly, Im just burnt out and furious.
Last night a good friend of mine, or who i thought was a good friend, had a huge fight...where she decided to end our friendship and break off into the arms of her white knight boyfriend.

The whole fight started when I wanted to show her, a feminist, why I am against feminism. She invited me to discuss our beliefs, as she has tried time and time again to convert me to feminism. Despite that, we were close...we both dealt with depression, liked the same music, and even tv shows. Over time I became more attracted to her. I told her, and her response was to sum it up, you shouldnt even like me, we are too different. Her reaction though...was one of disgust. This is when i should have ended the friendship, but she coaxed me into staying friends.

Well, yesterday...to prompt a discussion, I showed my feminist(ahem, tumblr feminist i.e. bisexual or gay) a video by Sandman...and another video by Bass that points out flaws in Laci Green's argument. I asked my friend to discuss what she thought about the commentary.

She said it was bullshit. I immediately ask her to give examples. Ive done this before. She always says shes too depressed and cant sleep well(cause having insomnia because youre on tumblr all night makes you not want to think) and last night was no different. She didnt give me a counterargument except that this is the result of american patriarchal society(go ahead, laugh it up). Except when I said to her that the makeup industry isnt making women insecure, it is taking advantage of already deep seeded insecurities brought on by an instinctual need to be the best and acquire desirable partners, she called me a condescending and annoying jerk who doesnt understanding how hard it is for her to be depressed and that i dont believe her. She lashes out at me all of a sudden and starts treating me like im a scab.

This, over a feminist vs. MRA discussion...needless to say we arent friends anymore. I did feel guilty for a while, but I came to realize something.

Shes a 21 year old bisexual who heavily prefers women while dating a guy who provides for her but is a huuuge mangina, and she is trying to get him to let her be polyamorous with a woman. She drinks a helluva lot and says shes too depressed to work and says depression is a legitimate disability. It hit me when I thought this and now im angry for wasting my time with her.

Shes a closet homo who is using guys so she can do what she wants without effort. She made herself out to be this special, thoughtful snowflake but the chicks victim mentality and hypocrisy were off the charts.

She said feminism was the answer for both men and women but refused to even listen to any material from the mens rights movement or the red pill and called it misogynistic.

Im angry!!!!! Why was i raised to believe that women were a certain way? That they were kind, nurturing, and loved you for who you are? Why was i fed the lies that being married was the pinnacle of manhood? Why was i fed the lies to be subservient to the system and to women to lead a happy life.

My very being, who i became, what my mom taught me was right...is all wrong. Im just a utility. True love doesnt exist.

Women are as loyal as their opportunity, and i feel like my major motivation in life has been ripped apart.

I hate feeling like this, and losing my friend was the icing on the cake...after seeing countless examples of the sheer assholery of women, I wish i didnt have such a damn intimate desire for them.

Women dont love you, they love what you represent or what you provide for them. American women can practically get away with hypergamy cause they can trade up easily thanks to social media. Most of them dont need one man...they have multiple men at their service. They can cry false rape and ruin a mans rep. They can divorce a man and take over half his assets, and they can be personality lacking, hive-minded succubi who lure you with beauty and suck your soul dry.

I'm at a point where as a black man in his early 20s and broke...I just dont give a fuck anymore. My life, as i know it, is a lie.