Guys it was too funny.

I wish I had a bingo card.

First thing she said.

I don’t usually just invite guys from tinder over to my place on the first date.

Oh my three kids I didn’t mention they are with their grandparents.

I just loved your pictures on Tinder.

Wow you have a job you like and your a happy person, everyone I meet is so negative.

You have your own house? 2 cars? A truck ? And your single?

Next thing you know she starts making excessive contact.

Next thing we’re naked and I hate fuck her like a whore and as soon as we’re done, she was like oh my god I came 4x. Your amazing I never do anything like this.

I literally fucked her so hard I broke her bed frame and it wasn’t enough for this slut she wanted to be choked and slammed around. I refused as I would never leave marks of that nature on some slut.

I wore a condom with spermicide obviously.

But as I started to get my clothes to leave she said , I had such a good time with you I want to see you again. I never sleep with anyone on the first date I must really like you....

Bitch I sent you 5 messages and spent less than two hours with you before you were naked.

I got in my car and she was immediately blocked.

Remember fellas AWALT.