Okay, let's see what the wingnuts of WAATGM have in store for me today.

I will just click on this one right he...

AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!

What the hell!

Bro. Nice one. You got me.

I don't know whether to puke, cringe, or go to church for an exorcism of my eyeballs. Either way, just looking at this pic makes me want to take a shower.

I have so many questions. If I were interviewing her, I would ask things like:

  • What could you POSSIBLY be looking for- aside from another STD?
  • Wouldn't you be better off in a biker bar?
  • What were you thinking...and why show it on a profile pic...
  • What sort of man would even want to talk with you?

If we are a match

Stop right there.

When I imagine a match for you, THIS is what comes to mind.

tell me your best pickup line

Bitch! I am not here to pick you up!

In fact only sheer morbid curiosity, and the worst elements of my own depravity are what is compelling my fingers to begrudgingly type the next thing right now. I really should not be wasting my precious Rona time on this!

Besides, I ain't here to pick up women, I'm here to ROAST em!

WOOT WOOT!

Anyways, since YOU are the one on the prowl, what's YOUR pickup line.

"I am a full time mom"

FFS. I am going to guess that this works quite well on your type...

im 5'5"

And I don't give a fuck. I'm 5'10". Who cares

but like tall guys

BITCH!

I am 5'9" of twisted steel and sex appeal. The extra inch is my halo.

One curiosity question though. I must ask. What type of dick do you prefer? Cut or uncut?

tatted

YIKES!

I'm the kind of girl that dont mind to Tell you

Yeah. I can see that. But that was something you could have kept to yourself. You seem pretty random and fucked up. From your shitty tats, to your shitty attitude you are one of the worst sort of losers I have seen here in a long time. And that is saying a LOT.

fuck off

Yeah, well screw you too, you nasty skank.

I am here to fuck up your life

Yeah, well I would say the same, but your life is so fucked up already that all I have to do is hope that nothing changes for you and you stay YOU for the rest of your life.

Snap

Yeah. Someone had to say it.

If you add me send me pictures

Oh hell no!

First of all, I will not send you any bunghole pics - because that's the vibe I am getting from you right now. Second, I don't want to end up on the FBI's database...AGAIN.

Besides, are you really asking for a dic pic rn? Mine is not tatted...much.

of your face

Yeah. No thanks.

Besides, what if I told you that I i could find one decent woman, I would quit WAATGM for good!

if not I

Ooops. Thanks for catching that typo.

So... if I told you I was looking for a woman to have a good solid relationship, with no ridiculous promises, no marriage contract, and no expectations of her - just all fun all the time,and I would pay all her bills forever. Her looks, her weight, her children, and her past would all be irrelevant.

All she would have to do is be faithful

What would you say then?

wont respond

Yeah, I figured as much.

In that case, I wish you a lifetime of being YOU until your dying day.

Buh Bye!!

Thanks to /u/mimiczx for the original.