Have a wife and kids make good money. Been weak and have been cheating on wife for years with plates and hookers and she's given up and we are now in a friendly open marriage for the kids but I can see she's dead inside and I feel terrible for how I've hurt her.

On paper everything seems like I'm living it up, but I'm suffering severe depression. Fucking everything is grey and boring. Been there done that. The only thing that brings me happiness is a new vagina. I'm fucking up to 10 hookers a week and a few girls from tinder or clubs. Doing tons of cocaine and alcohol. Somehow I've been coasting at my job mostly selling what I do as overly complicated and doing about 20% the work I used to do. Been this way for the past 5 years and now even this is getting boring. Still being a decent dad and keeping my shit together but honestly I'm a wreck inside.

I want to be a good dad and husband and enjoy my job, I feel like the path I'm on right now isn't going to end well and it's a viscous cycle. Wonder if I've destroyed my reward centers in my brain with all the sex and drugs. Somethings not right and i have no impulse control.

Anyways, should I quit my job and move the family. Go to counseling get on medication? Go on a sabattical with buddhist monks.

Need some advice beyond "just do it" and "change your mind" kind of shit. I think I have some severe addiction (sex and drugs, novelty seeking).