I’m not conventionally attractive at all and have been treated like garbage by men for it for most of my life. Between my experiences in the category of women deemed “unfuckable” and the general trash that men get up to, I can say that I had male culture and masculinity, and have no problem talking about this. They’ve never given me a reason to trust them and I won’t participate in gender roles/identity to earn their approval. For conventionally attractive or routinely sexualized/objectified women, they earn rewards from men for being “fuckable”, even more so if they play along. There is an advantage to conforming. But the sad reality is that in the exchanges women make with men to be protected under patriarchy, women are ALWAYS the losers. Our society pushes a narrative of “at least he doesn’t beat me” as the metric of a decent man. We trade our labour, our bodies, our income, our children for being legally and economically attached to a man who we should praise and be grateful to for not BEATING us, let alone treating us like full and equal partners. And this is seen as the ultimate objective. Every attempt to conform to the Western ideals of womanhood and beauty is manifested and embodied in second class citizenship as a free domestic slave. Fuck.