We always talk about building comfort for the girl, but what about for ourselves? I’m finding I have opportunities to escalate, but don’t want to for fear that it will work. And then they get bored or uninterested and I miss my shot.

Kind of a weird conundrum, and I’m unsure whether to accept it or fight against it.

Some back story, I got out of a 10 year relationship a couple months ago. So definitely processing that still. But I’m finding I’m rarely that attracted to women I meet. And I catch myself thinking “I probably could sleep with them but I’m not sure if I want to (or if I’m ready)”.

I guess my question is two-fold:

Scenario A: My thoughts are accurate, so how do I make sure I go slow enough that I’m comfortable without the girl getting impatient and losing interest. Or...

Scenario B: My thoughts are excuses coming from a place of fear and I just need to get over it and hook up with some people. In which case, any tips for working through this?