Long story short. I'm 18, wanted to change my personality by approaching and overcoming my fears since I was 16. Did not approach a girl in my life.

I lift, on NoFap, I dress well and I think I'm pretty confident especially when I'm in state. BUT!

1) I don't have any friends that are interested in picking up girls, heck it's impossible to socialize when I'm with them. (I don't really go out at the moment, so that's irrelevant for now, just saying that I have no friends.)

2) I live in a pretty much small city with no places to approach but there's a city next to me (30min driving).

Therefore, I need to do this on my own. But when I'm on my own I get into my head and can't even compliment people. 6 months ago I went out with some people and was approaching like crazy (without closing, but still, I felt like a god). I stopped going out with them, lost momentum, and I'm fucking frustrated.

I have many goals, but this 'change my personality' goal is fucking holding me back and It's the most important thing for me right now. It's not even about picking up girls, It's just that I know what it will do to my personality. I've always been this quiet, shy kid - but I don't want to be that anymore. I want to be able to hold conversations, socialize with everyone, fuck girls and have abundance.

As much as I know the importance of it, I can't commit to drive 30 min every day to approach or even do little things out of my comfort zone. I need accountability, but don't know where to find it. I journal every day, I do schedules and to-do lists, and you can always see the only thing I did not finish\tick is "GO OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE"\"COMPLIMENT 3 PEOPLE". I never get that shit done and I'm wasting years of my life.

I asked many questions here and in general about having approach anxiety, heck I don't even want to call it anxiety because I know once I approach that first girl I'm unstopabble. because that's what happened to me 6 months ago. But I keep coming back and asking questions. I don't know what do anymore! thanks.