We've been married for four years now, have a loving relationship, a child, etc. Still, I often feel degraded in the sexual aspect, here are two examples:

  1. Anal. When we started dating, she told me she liked anal, and how her previous boyfriend would hold her down without asking and fuck her butt. She would never have anal with me, either saying "some day" if i ask, or getting angry if I try to imitate what her old boyfriend did. Or says i need to train her butt, but when i try that she is never in the mood. This has been happening for over three years now

  2. Pics. She never lets me take sexual photos of her, even though she keeps these kinds of photos from her old boyfriends.

I feel like I'm not alpha enough for her, there are many more examples, but these are the first ones that come to mind.

Anyone was in the same situation? Is this fixable? How?