So, I don’t mean to be a whiner, but I’d like to get some things off my chest and this seems to be the best place to do as we are a like-minded group and I’m unlikely to receive judgment. I apologize ahead of time for the length.

I’m a 34 year old guy, raised in the Southern US, married at 21. I was in an 11 year marriage where I walked in on my ex in bed with another man. It was totally unexpected and I lost it. I went after the guy, the ex called the cops and tried to intervene (to protect him!) and I wound up accidentally punching her in the process. I was charged with domestic battery and simple battery and thrown in jail for 4 days, probation and fines afterwards. While I was in jail, the ex had my car towed, changed the locks and all my account passwords, and cleaned out our joint accounts. I also lost my job because I was unable to call in. With the money she essentially stole from me, she was able to get a fantastic attorney (I wasn’t) and take literally everything from me, including a house that I had put $25,000 (of money from my parents) down on.

I felt my life was over and attempted suicide. However, the gun jammed, the cops surrounded me and I was placed in a psychiatric hospital. Day 3 of my admission I hung myself with a robe and lost consciousness, but was cut down in time. This lengthened my stay to the state maximum of 15 days. Once out, my life spiraled out of control with substance abuse and deep depression. Finally, about 6 months ago I decided to get clean and move to another state where a sibling lives.

I now am sober, have a great job and my own place, but I still feel unhappy and lonely. I have dated plenty, but am always disappointed with the demanding expectations of the woman and for a variety of reasons I become disgusted and end things. In the past 2 months I haven’t dated any one. I’ve gotten to the point where I just HATE women. The problem is, I feel lonely (no male friends as I am new to the area and Covid has made socializing challenging) and I can’t see myself being with a man so I don’t know what to do. My sex drive is super high, but I just don’t feel like going through all the BS involved with women. I’ve been exploring my options, and while I’m not gay, I’m not opposed to filling my sexual needs with another man. I just wouldn’t want any real relationship. While I could see myself having sex with a man, I’m just not sure I would be emotionally attached. Is this unreasonable? Should I continue to hunt for a decent woman?

Any insight is appreciated, guys. Thanks for reading!