Some background info about me:
I'm a black man in his late 20's, I grew up in an abusive home and I was bullied in my teens because I spoke English, could read far better than my peers, and I had an interest in things like anime, rock music, and physiology. While I got some looks from girls here and there, I was mostly invisible because of my average looks. Growing up without a positive father figure to teach me how to seduce women meant that I had to learn things the hard way, like the very hard way. Whenever I summoned the courage to be flirty with women they would either giggle and walk away, ignore me, or say that they already had a boyfriend (sometimes this was true, and sometimes I'd see them starting a relationship with some new guy from my grade).
Needless to say I was an incel for a long time. My only means of sexual satisfaction was porn. To be clear I have nothing against porn and I don't feel guilty about using it. If I had any negative thoughts like that, it was from internet morons, hypocrites like Pamela Anderson and radical feminists who love to shame men for watching porn, while spewing dumb rhetoric like "just go out there and get the real thing."
Fast forward several years later and I discovered the red pill in my college years. I started looksmaxing like crazy (gym, cutting out soda and alcohol from my diet, hair, clothes, indifferent attitude). People around me started noticing the change and that was only the tip of the iceberg. I knew I had become a different person when a woman sucked me off in a bathroom mall. I knew I had become a different person when I made a 30 something milf tap out. And of course my crowning moment, when I hate fucked an annoying "Karen type" feminist in the ass while she begged me to cum in her ass.
You've think that as a former incel I'd be happy right? Well I'm not, and in some ways I still feel like an incel. Maybe I've become arrogant, maybe I just have higher self esteem. You be the judge. But the more I work on myself, the more certain female behavior annoys me.
The entitlement on dating app like Tinder. The fact that women proudly display undesirable traits on their bio (and in real life) that would make most of them incels if they were men, pissed me off. I knew that I was an incel because I had flaws that I needed to work on (and so I humbly did for years). So imagine my frustration when excuse my language "low-tier" women still think that they are a catch despite their bitchy attitudes. When I was an incel, i used to blindly believe that this was something that Chad's/Chadlites/Alpha's didn't have to deal with, but now I'm finding out from my "Chad" friends and red pill YouTubers that even they have experienced the same.
Whenever I interact with women these days, and they start asking/demanding for money or favor, I'm always comparing my value to them and thinking "And what are you bringing to the table? What makes you think you deserve that?" The answer is always nothing much.
I'm at a point where I'd rather skip the bullshit and just deal with escorts. They are honest, they don't flake on you at the last minute, they actually answer their phones and respond to messages, no mind games involved, they have the body type I want, oh and did I mention they know how to actually suck dick.
