Crosspost "As a guy, I'm tired of some females acting like I have to apologize for every bad thing that any man has ever done." from /r/TrueOffMyChest:
This happens often with female coworkers, female friends, girlfriends of my male friends, and potential partners. They bring up being catcalled, creepy dudes, or something they heard on the news about a woman being raped, sexually assaulted, or abused by a boyfriend/husband.
I just say "yeah that sucks" but they keep pushing as if they expect me to apologize on behalf of men or say "yeah, we men are awful" or "we as men need to be better". I'll often be asked "why aren't you more angry about this". Like, I'm no more angry about it than muggings, murders in general, child abuse, or other awful crimes. The most irritating is when they say I don't have to worry about anything and can walk around at night without any chance of being murdered, which isn't true. (Men get murdered more often than women, anyway.)
I've always respected womens boundaries and have never been accused of being creepy or anything, yet I'm constantly treated like I'm a part of the problem.
There was one particular girl who I had been talking to, to get to know each other. We really hit it off and shared a lot of mutual interests. However, she was really obsessed with sexual assault/sexism/abuse and I brushed it off at first but she kept on going off about it and sending me news articles she found about some crazy dude murdering his wife/girlfriend. It was like she was looking for this kind of stuff on a daily basis. One particular time she found out that a girl in a country halfway across the world was burtually murdered by her boyfriend and I just responded "what do you expect me to do about it". She wasn't happy about that.
It blew up when she told me that some guys in one of her college classes said she needed to shave her legs. As per the usual I just said "yeah that sucks, ignore them". She said "I hate how men expect women to shave their legs for them". I said "Well I guaruntee you that not all men do that." After that she exploded, saying that by saying "not all men" I'm no better than a rapist and that I'm contributing to rape culture and toxic masculinity. She refused to talk to me after her rant was done.
It's hard for me to feel sympathy for women about any of these things when they're constantly used as ammo to punish and shame all men. And I know that someone is going to miss the entire point of this post and say "what you're dealing with is nothing compared to what women have to go through!".
Posted by chunkbingus104 | 16 December 2020 |
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