Focus on YOU 👸🏽

242 points•22 comments•submitted by LogPsihoFDS Newbie to r/FemaleDatingStrategy

After my first break up of an almost five year relationship and getting cheated on (again), I was thrown out of the apartment at 3 a.m. after coming to talk. I was riding the tram to the bus station being visibly upset and this man sitting next to me decided to talk to me.

He shortly just said something along the lines of "Hey, whoever you feel upset about right now, I am sure they are not worth it. You have your whole life ahead of you so focus on you because great things await." I was 20 at the time and that didn't mean anything to me back then, but now I know he was right. I should have listened and not kept prioritising others (friends, family, partners) over my own well-being.

Now, 5 years later I'm just trying to implement this. After a close friend/classmate just dropped me after she had mistreated me, another male friend who I've known for 10 years literally tried to grab my ass when we last met (he has a girlfriend), a LVM used, disrespected me, lied to me and tried to gaslight me after being out of my life, another one just broke up our three month situationship over a text.. I am kind of done with relationships and people in general and vow to myself for the first time in my life to have enough self-respect and control to focus on and prioritise me.

I want to vow to not get tangled up in caring too much for others and distracting myself. From working to finish university (I am so close) and publish the studies I've been working on, to train my puppy into a well-behaved proper dog, to work on my health and fitness goals, to work enough to be able to support myself and my passions of dancing, climbing and hiking and to explore other things I might be interested in like travelling or horse riding and not just postpone life for later. Maybe along the way I can meet someone decent who won't be interested only in whatever I can give to them at that moment, whether it is help, sex, attention or an ego boost and who will treat me as an actual person. Until then, I will just keep doing me and YOU SHOULD, TOO. đź’ť