Basically the title. I've been an MRA for a large portion of my teen/adult life (I'm 23). I've seen a lot of my male friends be hurt by women, including one of my friends stuck in a loveless/sexless marriage he can't leave because he knows he'd lose his kids/all his money and possessions. And I've been browsing here for years, so I have seen a ton of the other issues men face.

And, look, I've suffered as a woman as well. I've been sexually assaulted, I've been stalked, I've been in abusive relationships, I've been thought less of because I'm a woman. So, I'm fully aware women have issues.

How do I make people understand that feminism isn't about equal rights? My friends keep saying that it's about equality, when everything I've seen doesn't reflect that. If actual feminism cared about equality, they'd spend more time on stuff like female genital mutilation and child marriages than about bullshit like manspreading (seriously, wtf). And, yes, there are some feminists who work on stuff like that. But the loudest ones aren't focused on that at all. They're too busy hating men, and blaming men for everything. (My boyfriend even has a saying--women [myself included] blame the nearest male.)

I don't see a patriarchy. I'm sure the possibility of one existing is there. But the only reason the wage gap exists is because women have kids and aren't as driven. In the dating world, women have absolutely all the power (admittedly, right up until they hit their thirties).

But... All I see is you guys LOSING. And suffering. And losing your kids and being expendable and disposable and alone and hurt. And then getting laughed at for your issues.

How do I make people understand your side of things? How do I make them understand that feminism isn't about equality, because it isn't (possibly 'just') women that need help?

Is it just useless to argue at this point? It feels useless.

Shit is fucked up.

I'm sorry y'all are going through this. I really am. I'm sorry you guys are alone. I'm sorry you guys are hurting. I'm sorry no one gives you compliments, or cares when your lives are ruined by rape accusations, or lose your kids, or have to work ALL THE TIME to provide for your family and come home to a wife that doesn't even work to maintain the home/herself. I'm sorry. I wish I could fix shit for you, but I can't, so I'm just gonna tell you this.

I love you. I think you're smart, handsome, funny, kind, brave, strong, and wonderful. I think you deserve much better than you get.

Thanks for listening to me ramble.

TL;DR: Basically the title, and a lot of 'I love you'.