Hello everyone, glad to be here.
First of all, I’m not sure if this is the right place for this story or not, as I wouldn’t say my rights have been legally violated. I just thought that this might resonate with some of you, and it’s one of the first incidents that made me realize it’s not easy being a man. Especially when it’s your word against a woman’s word.
So, let’s get to it:
In my late teens to early 20’s, I was working for a small organization that arranged various creative workshops for troubled young men. We worked with criminals, addicts, refugees etc.
In one of the cities where I worked the most, there was a somewhat similar organization. Their leader, a woman who was a few years older than me, reached out and suggested that perhaps we could work together.
So I was sent to have a meeting with this woman, and this initiated a good, mutually beneficial partnership for a while.
Skip forward a few years. The reasons are not important, but everything has gone downhill for me. I’m doing drugs, drinking, getting into fights, living on the streets, basically completely given up on life.
I bump into her, let’s just call her D. We chat. She can tell I’m lost and vulnerable. She tells me I can stay at her place. She even has an extra bed, and she’ll get me clean and sober before I’m gone. “It’s what she does” she tells me. I thank her but tell her I can’t accept that, and I barely know her. She insists, she won’t take no for an answer.
So we go to her place. Turns out she has a boyfriend who’s also living there. She has informed him of the situation and he’s fine with it, really nice guy. Let’s call him M.
I actually get clean, hell, I even start feeling somewhat confident and okay with my life. She’s caring and understanding. She listens, offers great advice and keeps me motivated and active for several months. We build up a great deal of trust and mutual respect.
But then, things start to go bad with her and M. He’s sad and stressed out. She’s angry and mean. Shocking change in character from her. The more they fight, the more flirtatious she gets with me. I brush it off, laugh, try to pretend that she’s just kidding. At the time I figured maybe she was.
The flirting is fairly innocent at first. But she changes even more. She wants to party every time M is not around. And I’m not talking soda parties... Booze, cocaine, mdma, anything that’ll fuck you up.
Booze and cocaine are my main “demons”. They change me, turn me into someone I don’t wanna be…
During one party, she makes out with a friend of mine, and with me shortly after. I feel like shit about not rejecting her, and I have no excuse, but I didn’t. She tells us that “M knows I’ll make out with whoever I want. He’s accepted that”.
After a while, the tensions between D and M finally come to a boiling point. They break up and she kicks him out of the apartment. She tells me she needs to get her party on and considering how she’d been there for me when I needed it, I told her “anything you need”.
I’m not sure for how long exactly, it’s quite blurry, but for the next 3-5 days I suppose, the flirting is NOT innocent… She keeps encouraging me to drink more. The drunker I get, the more she takes advantage of the fact. She grabs my crotch, kisses/licks my neck any time I’m not paying attention, even tries OFTEN to put her hand down my pants and start jacking me off. I reject her time and time again. I keep telling her I don’t wanna have sex with her, and I don’t feel like it would be fair to M, as I believe they will get back together and he’s a very nice guy.
Now, I’m also not proud of this last part… But after all that time drinking and being sexually harassed, my balls are blue and my conscience is, well… Gone in a pool of alcohol. It’s not an excuse, I know. But I finally break. She climbs into my bed suddenly after a long day of drinking, and I’m really hammered. Pretty much too drunk to resist, at least too drunk to care. She starts kissing me and jerking me off. At first, I tell her to go away, but I’m too drunk and tired to push her away. She just giggles and continues. I give in. Things are getting hot and heavy and as I’m almost about to penetrate her, she starts “having doubts”. I get pretty annoyed and say something along the lines of “you gotta be fucking kidding me”. We have sex.
After a few days, D tells me she’s back together with M. She also tells me, she felt bad about what happened, and she told him everything. I don’t really get mad about this. I felt bad too. But here’s where it gets really messed up. I talk to M, and of course I tell him I feel like shit about the whole thing and I’m really sorry. I’d never done anything like this to someone I got along with like him, and it was very difficult to look him in the eyes and talk about it, but I sure as hell owed him that at least.
During my conversation with him however, I realize she told him that “I pressured her into having sex”?!
And he believed her. Not only that, she’d told other people that “version” of the story. And those people still believe her, still hate me for it. When I confronted her about the sexual harassment leading up to the whole thing, she acted perplexed about my view on it, and said that what she’d told everyone was true. She didn’t sexually harass me, it was just “friendly teasing” and “her playful side”. Women can’t sexually harass men she said.
A while after that, I get a call from M. He’s very angry, screaming into the phone that he’ll kill me if he ever sees me again. As he realizes I have no idea what’s he’s so upset about, as we’d buried the hatchet so long ago, he tells me D gave him herpes, and she’d told him she got it from me. I tell him I’ve never had herpes, and he can tell that I’m being truthful. At the end of that conversation he tells that after he broke up with her, she immediately found a new boyfriend, and a few days after he saw her AND her new boyfriend stealing the rims from his car, and he even saw them straight up trying to spy on him multiple times. He apologizes, and I do the same. We end up laughing about how absolutely crazy she is, and how both of us are lucky to be free of her.

Well shit, this turned out to be a long one. If it fits the forum however, let me know. There’s more where it came from.