Background info, have been masturbating daily or 2x daily since high school. Finally cleaned up myself and did no fap or porn for 90 days. Lost weight and in the gym as well. I had multiple sexual experiences in the past 3 months but was not able to keep an erection. I had a doctor prescribe me viagra but no matter the dosage I lose my erection. I am under the impression that it is performance anxiety, but I also may just not be able to hold an erection for that long. I notice that I take a very long time during foreplay to try to begin escalating to sex (almost 30 - 90 minutes). I also had a lot of anxiety about putting the condom on in front of her. I have a fat glans but also am uncircumcised with very minor phimotic ring tightness so I need to use trojan magnums to fit comfortably. Part of my anxiety stems from going soft or potentially going softer with the condom on.

This girl that I am with is sexy, and I find that I can easily get an erection with her before sex, but the only time in my life (with the same girl) I tried penetration was in missionary and I lost my erection right before penetration. I think it may be because I was not on my back in my usual masturbation position. But I am 22 and should not have issues with my penis and changing positions!

Now here is the other issue. Since as long as I remember, I can only masturbate with my knees extended, legs locked and flexed. I can't bend my knees while having a masturbation session. I recently tied this into constantly flexing my BC muscle / involuntary kegeling. Now that I think about it, there have been only a handful of times I have ever orgasmed without flexing my BC. I have noticed a dull pain in my taint when I sneeze hard every once in a blue moon, and also have difficulty urinating in public around other people (further signs of BC issue?). Most importantly, due to my overweight status, I have found myself sucking in my stomach unconsciously for quite a while. I think this contributed to my pelvic floor tension.

Guys, I do not care about length enhancement, or PE, or stamina. I really just want to be able to have sex, no matter how long the duration. This shame is killing me on the inside and the thought of not being able to resolve this is horrifying. I have implemented doing reverse kegels to help with the BC tightness, and also am consciously at all points of the day making sure I am breathing from my belly and not sucking my stomach in. I can't do hindi squats without staying on the balls of my feet, and doing wall happy baby and MarcusHA pillow stretch doesn't mean anything to me because I have no idea if I am even stretching my pelvic muscles or not.

Am I overthinking this? Maybe I really am just taking too long to begin having sex and I simply cannot have an erection that long. In reality maybe everything is fine and I only have the issue of inexperience and a slightly tense pelvic floor. When I find myself having an erection with my girlfriend, should I focus on forcing my BC to relax, or making sure it is not constricted/engaged? Won't I lose my erection if I am not constricting my BC once I have an erection?