https://www.psycom.net/cognitive-dissonance

“I have patients who go on dating apps and tell me all they get is rejection. I like to remind them that they've rejected some people too, and it wasn't that big of a deal. They didn't hate them. They didn't think they were disgusting. They were just like, ‘Oh, this person is not for me.’ But when they turn it around on themselves, they're harsher and internalize the thought to ‘I'm horrible. No one likes me. I'm just a loser.’ This destructive pattern of thinking reinforces the dissonance and can shape behaviors to replay out this negative cycle for the long term,” Gallagher says.

Sound familiar?