Just had big realisation about my life so far. I drag my pain from childhood - mixture of abandonment from my mom, not involved father figure, bullying from elementary school. I can not rest, believe people, distorted ways of thinking, general unhappiness, possible depression/anxiety/dissociation/PTSD/attention problems now

RP for me was a god send, made me feel like I don't need no one, fuck bad people, without ever thinking twice to why certain things happen to me, all the time!

No way I'm blaming that sub, in one side it's great, whole self improvement thing is spot on, relationships however, here and there. What confused me and made me insecure was reaching archetypal perfect man that they are portraying. I guess it's so possible for someone who has his mind set, not suffering from horrible past. For me, It's a tough work. I find much easier to jump back into my mind and not ever be present, not knowing why do I do such a thing.

Now, I guess being there and trying to do majority of things is not for me in this period of life, until I heal. After, we will see how much my mind detox and chips set where they may

Anyone going through similar experience?