I was inspired to post by another one about politeness toward men.
I am naturally loud. Like I don't know how I do it but I take a lot of space without having intention to do so. I talk a lot, loudly I move loudly, I sing and express myself how I want... but until now I hated it. For a very long time I felt ashamed of myself and dreamed to be a "softspoken and elegant lady". I felt like I was some kind of clumsy barbarian...
A lot of teachers and people around me have told me all my life that I should learn to be discreet, to let other have space, to "cut myself in smaller pieces", to be more lady-like. And yes, I agree that it is important to let everyone have space to expresse themselves but I have the right to be loud, to be heard and to be me.
When I was younger I thought that when I had to become this kind of delicate women to be admired and respected. But it will never happen, I will never be a frail and discreet background character. Because I can't change who I am and I don't want to anymore.
I will not be afraid to be loud, I will take space, I will say what I think and express my feelings and beliefs. My right to be respected and my feminity aren't tied to an ideal that is oppressive and misogynistic.
there doesn't seem to be anything here