Hi ladies! I hope you're all well. I'm just going to cut to the chase:

I was studying abroad in England last year and met this guy at the university I was studying at. He seemed a bit off to me at first, but I thought it was a cultural thing and looked past it. We ended up going for a drink (I know, my mistake) and I had an awful time. Writing every thing shitty he did would make this post long, so I'm just going to highlight the four most egregious: 1) kept touching my thigh even when I made it clear that I did not like it, 2) said he was glad to find a pretty girl who could actually hold conversation and didn't just rely on her looks (which is hilarious because he was basically talking about himself the whole time), 3) was really obviously trying to get me drunk probably so that I would go home with him, and 4) kept making weird fetish-y comments about the fact that he's White and I'm Black.

I hadn't discovered this sub at the time, but even then I knew that his behavior was not acceptable. We had made plans to hang out again later (I only said yes in the moment to be able to leave safely because tbh I did not trust that a man who would blatantly try to get me more drunk would take in-person rejection well) so when he texted me to follow up, I politely let him know that I was not interested. He kept egging me on for why so I laid it out for him.

He gave this half-assed apology about how he just has British humor and that it was unfair of me to hold his more aggressive behavior against him because I hadn't established that it was a boundary I had. I was just like "ok" because I didn't feel like dealing with him, and then he changed his tune and started talking about how sorry he is and how he's not that guy, I just make him nervous. At this point, I left him on read and that's when things got weird.

He would text me randomly, pretending that nothing happened like "how are you?" or "you look so pretty today" or "let's get dinner tomorrow?" I blocked him, and then he started getting mutual acquaintances to text me on his behalf! He obviously told them some sob story because they were usually sympathetic to him but when I set things straight they take my side and apologize for bothering me. The only thing is that it gets exhausting having to explain my side of this one shitty date that happened EIGHT MONTHS AGO at least once a month. Like clockwork, I get someone DM-ing me, texting me, or snapchatting me on his behalf.

I just don't get it. I left the UK months ago due to the coronavirus cutting my program short. He knows that. I'm just tired of all this and I've reached my wits end. The only think I can think of is making an Instagram story putting this whole situation on blast so that the people he would normally reach out to will know in advance and decline to help him, but I talked to my friend about it and she told me that it's in bad taste. I see where she's coming from, but I also don't feel like messaging every single person I came across while on my study abroad.

What do you ladies think? I respect you all a lot and appreciate your thoughts!