This has been a long time coming. Deep down I’ve always known the truth about MGTOW, however I failed to realize it until it was almost too late. After several LTRs and dealing with the unending anxiety of insecurity in college, I dove headlong into MGTOW before I even knew what it was. By my mid-late 20s I was a successful bachelor who was on the cusp of defining greatness, had given up chasing women, left my fake friends in the dust, and was content being the best I could be. By the age of 31 I had accomplished everything I ever wanted to do… and then I was empty. So I filled that sense of purpose by doting on my wife.

We got married when I was 29, and I was smack-dab in the middle of the most defining point in my career (joining the top 1% of the military – some of you will understand this). The next couple of years would prove challenging as I attempted to balance the completion of my personal quest with starting a family. Throughout my initial deployments and quests, I had a sense of dread that I was not giving enough to my wife, and it tore me up inside. She was emotional, and I was weak. Eventually, I began appeasing her neediness and crushing my own dreams. Even so, the time we spent together was meaningful and everything else was water under the bridge. I was complacent.

Fast-forward several years and my wife begins to realize that she, too, has goals. She eventually decides that competing in fitness competitions is her thing… and here’s the kicker, she’s really good. All of the sudden I start to experience a sense of insecurity unlike anything I have ever known. I beta down hard and project my insecurities on her. She’s dressing differently, she’s talking differently, she’s constantly validating herself on social media, and guess what? There is no time for me. Sex is non-existent and I beta even further. We clash to the brink of divorce and I am miserable.

I found myself enrolled with a counselor and spent endless time on /deadbedrooms looking for a sense of belonging. It was pathetic. That is until I found MRP and MGTOW. You all have given me the hard smack of reality I needed to pick myself back up, brush off the pathetic beta-ness, and get back to work. I finished NMMNG, WISNIFG, and am almost done with Superior Man. I am practicing dread 1 and 2, looking to move onto 3. I am on a short deployment right now, but when I get back there are two things I want to do (two things I WILL do): take up martial arts and learn to play guitar. I’ve always been a gym rat, but I recently found a renewed sense of purpose by adding regular cardio and changing my diet.

A few things I’ve learned so far:

  1. Almost all mainstream music is beta. I’ve cut that shit out.

  2. The grass is never greener, it’s just different grass.

  3. I never have to justify myself.

  4. I refuse to feel guilty for taking care of me.

  5. IDGAF (although years of beta sometimes creeps back in my mind and I have to work hard to turn it into drive)

  6. Whatever happens, I can handle it.

Finally, thank you guys for showing me what I’ve always known but failed to understand. Any recommendations on martial arts that focus on general bad-assery and ass-kickery?