So... I’m gonna try and make this as short and painless as possible. I’m recently out of a 30 day rehab for alcohol. Part of the reason I went back to drinking was because my girlfriend was flat out ignoring me and playing mind games.

I, like a dumbass, let this continue for awhile until I had enough of her. I started ignoring all her calls and said fuck you bitch and started drinking heavily again.

You see, I’ve been pretty depressed for a long while and me being introverted just fed my depression... for a long time. So when I went back to drinking I was a mess. I was sobbing uncontrollably all the time, bugging old friends and basically had the “oh why me” mentallity, which I know... is stupid.

The good thing is that I ignored my girlfriend for that little while I was binge drinking. Well the drinking escalated quickly and after awhile the shakes set in when I wasn’t drinking.

I knew I had to make change. My mother was kind enough (bless her heart) to pay for my stay at a nice detox/rehab. Well, funny enough, the day I set out for rehab my girlfriend called me and I stupidly picked up.

I told her I didn’t want to be with her anymore and I couldn’t take the mental abuse and mind games she pulled. Well, she begged and begged and begged and I finally gave in.

I let her know I wa going to rehab and when I got out I’d be better. She said she would wait for me and that she loved me. Hahahaha. I had little faith in what she said and should have just told her to fuck off.

So, 28 days later, here I am. Clean as a whistle and ready to progress in life. Guess who blocked me on Facebook ? You guessed it! I used a buddy’s Facebook and about 15 days ago she posted “ I waited for you.”

So, needless to say I am hurt, but I kinda knew it was coming. I may be a fucking alcoholic/addict but I’m not stupid. To be fair, she had low self esteem and was always jealous of me talking to girls. And she did say “you’ll probably just meet a girl in rehab and forget about me.” Which, I kinda did.

I met two girls who were pretty cool and fucked up like me. We flirted, had some laughs and smoked cigarettes outside and talked. But, I know I can never be with these girls. Everyone who’s been in recovery knows never to date anyone else in recovery at least in the early stages.

So, here I am... unemployed, freshly sober and aimless. Depressed, empty and trying to find meaning in the chaos. I should also let you know I have son and live with my dad. I get my son every other week and we have a great relationship. My family is also pretty close.

The problem is, I don’t have any close friends and I feel really alone for the first time in a long time.

I wanna go my own way, but it’s gonna be hard. Any advice for guys that are newcomers to this kinda stuff?

This post is way longer than I intended it to be, but that’s okay, I needed to vent.