Hey everyone, I'm not sure who I should vent this out to, but I figured that you guys would be the most understanding of my situation.

They say that college is the best 4 years of your life, but as a freshman, it feels like the opposite to me. People like to sell this idea that you're free to whatever you want here without any restrictions and that you're supposed to have a great time with your friends, but I always find myself stuck in my room or at the library trying to finish my assignments or study for an exam. Perhaps it might just be my strong work ethic that I've obtained since GMOW in high school. I've always liked to look at things in the long term, and to tell myself that the hard work that I do now will eventually pay off in 4-8 years. For my first year of college, I've taken close to the max possible credits I'm allowed to do per semester, as this will allow me to take more advanced computer science courses sooner, making me a more attractive prospective intern for top tier companies. I've always been in love with the computer and software world so in a way I do feel at home here considering some of the classes and clubs I'm currently a part of. When I want a short break from coursework, I usually give myself some side programming projects to work on (currently working on a DIY Raspberry Pi IoT solution to save myself some money from buying overpriced solutions from outside). However, last semester, the classes I took were extremely rigorous, and that in combination with the number of classes I was taking as well as transitioning into college resulted in me receiving a lower than expected GPA. Initially in the semester I had made time to hang out with friends and have fun and all that good stuff. However, I was already beginning to cut that down as the semester went on. To make things even harder, I promised to myself that I would achieve a 4.0 GPA this semester to make up for the bad grades I received in some of my classes last semester, so this would mean that I would get zero time for socialization or any other fun. So far I feel like I'm on track with my goal as my test and assignment scores have been pretty good. However, I see my friends having a great time on Friday nights while I'm stuck in my room not being able to understand jackshit because my ADHD distracts the fuck out of me everytime I hear a voice or a footstep in the hallway or when I get a notification on my phone. I understand that my work will pay off in the long term, but it sometimes discourages me to see everyone else having fun, some of whom have a similar schedule to mine and seem to be on top of things. Sometimes I make the mistake of questioning myself, "is all my work and reclusiveness really worth it?" Any tips on how to stop worrying about others and focus more on worrying about myself? Do these 4 years really matter much or does it get better after this?

PS: Can't wait to go monk mode on everybody after getting a job on the other side of the US.