This is about my journey towards MGTOW, until deciding to a monk, and my difficulties with it.

I have learned about many schools of thought, many religion and philosophy, from Eastern to Western.

I learnt from Taoism to have an open mind, be one with heaven and earth, regulate yourself under "无为," observe 阴阳, and act accordingly. 形而上谓之道，形而下谓之器。 The heaven is metaphysics, the holy and spiritual, the source and the pattern of the world, and the Earth is the physical world, shape, substance and material. The sexes of male and female correspond to heaven and earth, 阴阳.

My philosophy has Taoism as its basis.

Modern science has been able to describe the Earth very well, though not complete, and still has some flaws. For me, there are two ways to study Earth, one is through Empirical Thinking and the philosophy of natural sciences, based on experience, another is through Math, making predictions and calculations. The scientific Method incorporates both, and has been successful. No other method known to mankind has able to work this well in the realm of Earth.

Back to Spirituality & the Heavenly.

Confucianism allowed me to understand the constructs of the society, and nature of human beings, the connection between man and the world, and how should one conduct themselves to lead a successful life in the society. The duties of a man. 修身齐家治国平天下。You start with self-fulfillment, then family duty, then govern a country, and finally the world.

In studying the spiritual, I felt that Hinduism(left), Buddhism(middle), and Jainism(right), had deep understanding of the spiritual world and a good system of meditation. I first learnt of Zen Buddhism, then learnt that its world view was partially inspired by Hinduism, and looked into Chakra, finally reaching out to Jainism. Hinduism and Jainism represent to both extremes in a spiritual outer/inner world, and Buddhism is the middle way.

Hinduism showed the relationship between experience and senses, body and mind, and endless cycles of dharma, karma and suffering.

The idea of Buddhism that only you can save yourself, and the idea of walking away from the false reality of happiness conjured by society, was probably why I approached MGTOW.

The idea of free-will, and no all-powerful Lord or entity controlling all in Jainism, have allowed me to uphold my spirit, uphold my principles and freedom.

I have stumbled onto Greek philosophy and mythology, along with Norse and Egyptian mythology through some video games and books, and took great interest. The Norse runes and Egyptian magic made me interested in occult for a while, and researched it, but I never practiced it.

From learning occult, I found the Kabala tree of life from Judaism a very interesting concept.

I also ventured onto Christianity, and realized after some time that the Trinity was explaining the relationship of body, mind, and the source. I didn't believe in any God of religion, so I replaced it with the source.

A year ago, I had deepened my understanding by realizing these religions had so much in common. All were created by wise men, the only difference is that they walked different paths. It is from then on, that I started to work on my on philosophy, acting it out through real life.

There was one point when I attempted to become devoid of feelings and emotions, and acting like a AI robot of pure logic, with no spirit or soul. It didn't work, and I performed worser off than before, and it was like proof for me, that humans have something spiritual.

I thought that being a monk was appealing, but I was unable to keep my lusts away. I'm going through puberty, so it's probably not the right time yet. I have prepared myself mentally for a long period of time, and studied the knowledge of philosophy, but in terms of practice, I haven't done much, though I'm starting to.

Recently, I discovered MGTOW, and realized that there were men, who maybe didn't want to join a religion, but wanted to live as monks, that pursed an area of expertise in the society. I joined after watching some videos, which a lot were shocking to me.

Well, and it was easy to accept, because I do have some anecdotal experience that relates to the facts given to me.

The difficulties would be controlling my lusts, and finding time to go through meditation, which I am very interested in and have made my own personal way (only tested out early stages of it).

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