I’ve been trying to get more in touch with my masculine side since going my own way. Eating more meat, drinking more beer, etc. About a month ago I saw a commercial for a product called Nugenix that said it was “man boosting.” Sounds great. I’ve been taking it and it really works - I’ve been crushing it on my bow flex and bitches wish they could experience the erections I have. Unfortunately for them I closed the door on that!

Here’s the problem. I literally haven’t shit once since I started taking Nugenix. Not even a single nugget has squeezed its way out of there. Has anyone else experienced this? I’m not sure what to do. Is my body just that efficient at concerting waste to testosterone? Or should I be worried?