Never thought I’d ask random internet people for advice, but I want to hear what you have to say about this one.

SpaceWolf35 · 2018-03-02T09:55:10+00:00

You only get one life and that's reason enough to do whatever you want, but also reason not to squander it. Do some soul searching, decide if this is what you really want to do. If it is, just go for it and don't look back.

Here's a big revelation that will help you get by regardless of what happens: no matter what decisions you make, experiences you have, hardships you face, or anything else, one day you'll be dead and none of it will have mattered at all. So just live for the moment and go fuckin apeshit.

sidel3 · 2018-03-02T11:23:39+00:00

Some men just need to learn the hard way. Go get her tiger....

TempleOfIron · 2018-03-02T09:56:19+00:00

She's playing chameleon. You're placing all your ideals and boosting her pedestal up even further. Women are rarely ever consistent.

You say she's a unicorn but this just furthers my point that you are seeing it through glitter coated lenses. I would bet 'random internet people' would not persuade you from your idealism.

You say she's a diehard virgin until marriage. This is alarm bells ringing off in my head. I'm not sure what you are asking? Are you saying you want to go back to the plantation when you know full well marriage is her end goal?

RadicalAsceticMonk · 2018-03-02T12:51:12+00:00

She was (and probably still is, though I’m not 100% sure) a diehard virgin-until-marriage. She’s brilliant, stimulates me mentally the way my best male friends do, and genuinely seems like a unicorn.

One hymen away from the plantation.You know what? Marry this unicorn ASAP, my friend. We always have use for another story of another tradthot turning into a worthless harpy after a few years/months of marriage. Just try not crying when the inevitable happens.

SupersoakerJones · 2018-03-02T09:41:30+00:00

I’m going to go to sleep and think on this one. I hope you guys have some good insight into this situation other than just “AWALT” “RUN”

zuhbooze · 2018-03-02T10:07:03+00:00

Unicorn. Virgin.

It's easy to get wrapped up in emotions and make decisions based on such. You said it yourself, you've been "pretty much a fuck up". I'm not entirely sure on the accuracy or depth of that statement, but one would have to think if you truly feel that way then there's a disconnect and issues with your self esteem and motivation.

She's most likely not a virgin and she's absolutely not a unicorn. You're looking at her through a filter, one which is heavily nostalgic. It didn't work the first time, regardless of why, as that's irrelevant.

This doesn't seem to be a case where your twos past was casual and things never took off, which if it was just casual then a "second" go may be possible. However, feelings, attachment and commitment were most likely present. Exes are exes for a reason. You'll most likely pursue this illusionary flame only to find out that the fire is merely a pile of hopes and ashes of what once was.

From experience, save your time, as it's your most valuable asset, and invest it in something that has true potential for growth. Best of luck.

Xein · 2018-03-02T13:03:46+00:00

I wouldn't listen to a bunch of fucks on the internet. You gotta make your own decisions. Don't let anyone else run your life for you.

Odds are pretty good that you'll get burned, but you already know that. Then again, there are some people that are happily married and stay that way for many years. If she is actually a virgin then that improves your odds substantially.

DWShimoda · 2018-03-02T16:52:22+00:00

To quote from Tolkien:

"[...] advice is a dangerous gift, even from the wise to the wise, and all courses may run ill. But what would you? You have not told me all concerning yourself; and how then shall I choose better than you?"

And regarding the woman's likely eventual behavior, well "It's difficult to make predictions, especially about the Future." -- and even more so in regards to the future choices, actions & behaviors of specific individual people.

AWALT is a very reliable "rule of thumb" when applied to women in general; the standard disparagement of "NAWALT" and "Unicorns" in these parts is ALSO reliable -- because the vast majority of men who claim "but my girlfriend/wife is 'DIFFERENT' and etc... [ad nauseum]" are simply engaged in self-delusional projection (i.e. virtually NO man marries a woman whom they EXPECT to cheat on & betray them, divorce rape their ass, or become a life-long 'unhappy' wifeoid/slave-master -- yet the vast {some would say overwhelming} majority of women become EXACTLY that -- ergo most of those men are {demonstrably, over time, proven} wrong about THEIR "NAWALT/Unicorn").

ALL THAT SAID...

There probably (or at least possibly) DOES still exist a small fraction of females who have not only not yet been "corrupted" but who can (more or less) likely remain "uncorrupted" (presuming in addition, of course that you yourself don't FUBAR the relationship somewhere down the line).

So, the chief problem is... how do you tell a "Unicorn" from a "Chameleon" merely pretending to be one. (And understand that it IS standard normal & natural female nature -- not even necessarily "malicious" -- to engage in such "chameleon" like behavior... cf Tolkien's letter {see link & scroll down to #43} to his son Michael on women/marriage, etc.)

While it is NOT entirely foolproof, there ARE several indicators; from the most obvious ones you have already cited: her own past/present behavior, what she did (esp. in terms of relationships after you broke up with her -- i.e. did she IMMEDIATELY and/or ENTHUSIASTICALLY hook-up {sexual or otherwise} with someone else?); the extent to which she seems to be "status seeking" and etc. To other things that can serve as somewhat "reliable" (say 50/50 chance indicator) including chiefly:

Look at her MOTHER -- that's a fairly likely indicator of what she will become 20+ to 30+ years in the future.
Look also at her mother's PAST -- at least as far as you are able -- did she marry the father? Was she married/divorced (or cohabit/LTR + breakup; same thing) prior? Etc. Again, the mother's behavioral life-pattern is a fairly likely indicator of what the daughter will do.
Look at her father -- assuming he IS in the picture and still living -- is he a relatively "happy" person? Does he have interests, activities, hobbies and FRIENDS outside of the "marital relationship"?? Does the mother (his wife) seem to RESPECT him, etc? If so, these are all "fairly good" indicators of how the girl MAY treat her own husband, and of the advice her mother will give her.
Conversely, has the father been divorce raped? Driven from the home? Or alternately (and perhaps worse) is he nothing more than a workhorse/slave to his wife (and possibly daughter)? Does he recite things like "Happy Wife, Happy Life"? Does he refer to his daughter as his "Little Princess"??? If so, THAT too is an "fairly reliable" indicator of what life with this girl will be like... Like mother, like daughter.

If you feel you need some OTHER, "outside" indicator or (LOL) no-holds barred "review" of this chick... then I would suggest that any young BOYS* you know (i.e. nephews/other kids -- ideally say ages 5/7 up to 10/12 who both know you and LIKE you) will provide your best feedback; let them meet her, observe her (and you interacting with her) ideally at some family or other group activity. Then arrange to do something with them (without her around) and just casually ask them what they think of her. If they LIKE her, then that's an endorsement... but if they scrunch up their nose, give you assorted negative comments, or even try to "equivocate" with how they answer... well there you have it.

Keep in mind you MAY have to "extrapolate" or ask some additional questions about what they mean -- after all young boys, while often blunt & to the point (and good "spotters" of bullshitters & fakes), aren't necessarily going to be really verbose (not on something they aren't personally interested in), so a response from your nephew "Davey" of "Well, she's pretty" isn't necessarily an endorsement... you may need to dig a bit further: i.e. "What do you mean by 'she's pretty' Davey?" -- might solicit anything from, "I dunno, she's just nice looking and I guess nice & friendly and stuff... I like her." (which IS an endorsement), to "She's hawt! But I think she wears too much makeup...and she seems to act like a 'princess' and stuff..." (which is NOT an endorsement).

* Kids (especially boys) at that age -- generally speaking -- haven't developed the "civilized 'adult' filters" -- they pretty much tell it like they see it (at least when they're not concerned about any negative consequences to themselves)."

Hope some of that helps.

Remember, no one can make your choices for you -- and whether you follow (or dismiss) other people's advice -- well THAT is still your choice.

Best of Luck (you're gonna need THAT too).

EDIT: By the way... if you DO decide to hook back up with her, marry her... and she turns out to be an AWALT... don't fucking try to blame US. You choose to play with fire, it's your own damned fault if you get torched.

Title	Never thought I’d ask random internet people for advice, but I want to hear what you have to say about this one.
Author	SupersoakerJones
Upvotes	5
Comments	14
Date	March 2, 2018 9:38 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/81d44r/never_thought_id_ask_random_internet_people_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/never-thought-id-ask-random-internet-people-for.586960 https://theredarchive.com/post/586960

Comments

ALL THAT SAID...

Hope some of that helps.