The two errors that men can get into when thinking about women are:

  1. the "women are wonderful" effect (see Wiki for description) a.k.a. the blue-pill, and
  2. the "women are supernatural evil creatures" effect (my concoction) a.k.a. r/MGTOW.

You've probably seen my statement "women are just people trying to get by as best they can" plenty of times, and you'll see it plenty more times in the future as well. Women are just people, neither inherently good or evil. It's an important red-pill lesson that takes away some of the power that we give them. Remove testosterone poisoning and social conditioning and you'll see that many problems we have with women start from ourselves.

Well, testosterone goes away with age as I can attesticulate, but getting rid of social conditioning requires introspection. For the purposes of introspection, here is my list:

  1. If I'm having sex with a woman and I feel that she deserves marriage just because she lets me have sex with her, then that's on me, that's not on her. (I still shudder when I think how close I came to marriage to my first LTR for that reason).

  2. If I am dating a woman and I feel that she deserves gifts just for dating me, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  3. If I feel that a woman owes me something for being nice to her, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  4. If I get upset because a woman acts like a woman, then that's on me, that's not on her. Remember the Scorpion and the Frog, my friend.

  5. If I put my validation into the hands of a woman like the incels and some PUAs do, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  6. If I think that I'm making a positive contribution to my life just by being critical of women, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  7. If I feel I'm a victim because of how I look, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  8. If I overlook red-flags through testosterone poisoning, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  9. If I can't make good women friends, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  10. If I think marrying a woman from another country is a solution, then that's on me, that's not on her.

  11. If you don't upvote this thread, then that's on you, it's not on me.

Obviously there are a lot of valid "it's on her, not on me" counter-examples that I'm sure are already going through the minds of many on this board. But this thread is about the harder part of introspection: digging out the mote in my own eye.

What do you think? Any "it's on me, not on her" contributions? Either because "all women good" or "all women bad".