Been lurking here for about 18 months under a different account... I don't want to take forever so let me sum it up:

-Knocked up my girlfriend when we were 19.

-Decided to "man up and be responsible" and married her....we were both 20 when he was born (not even old enough to buy a beer.)

-Several years of 'bullshit and her hating me' later I fucking gave up and left her. (Yes it's weird, but I did indeed file for the divorce.)

-Courts side with her and she gets temporary custody of (by then) both kids.

-She can't handle our son on her own (7 year old starting fires and shit) and asks me if I want custody. (HELL YEAH.)

-I raise said son by myself as a single dad for many years (A student) until he is a Junior in high school.

-My entire department (and job as manager of 14 years) get's unexpectedly outsourced and shut down.

-Unemployed for...not at all....my experience got me a new job right away.

-....In a different city...45 minute drive one way (vs. 5 minutes I was used to) + a sizeable pay cut.

-Between the extra gas and lost wages, about a 44% reduction in take home pay.

-Continue to commute for his sake because I don't want to make him change schools when he's already a sophomore.

-Keep it up for 18 months.

-Can't do it anymore and finally have to move closer to new job.

-Sign a lease on an expensive apartment near his new school.

-He's now 17 and REFUSES to go to the new school. (Ever try to get a 17 year old boy to do what you want?)

-He wants to go live with, and go to school with his sister. I explain the nature of the lease I signed to his mom, and told her that "I'm on the hook for this lease, and because I expected him to live with me, I literally can't afford this place plus more child support if he comes to live with you." (We each have custody of one of our kids, but even though her income is comparable, I still pay her.)

-She "Promises" that she won't push for more child support...she just wants to make sure he's not dropping out. Which is the only reason I agreed to sign him over.

-About four months later (after he's safely her's in the courts eyes) she pushes for the full child support amount and gets it.

-Even though I've worked in a skilled trade consistently for almost twenty years, suddenly I'm paying so much child support for two children that my take home pay is about $900 per MONTH.

-Meanwhile, because she's not married to the guy she's been living with for over ten years (and has an 8 year old with) - their combined six figure income isn't even considered by the courts. PLUS she gets over half of my paycheck.

...How have I survived on $900 a month? I managed to snag a 3 bedroom apartment that is only 4 blocks from work. I rented out the other two bedrooms to strangers, AND took my car off the road. .....and fucking BEANS AND RICE. Because I make "too much money" (gross) I don't qualify for government food assistance, or medical insurance. I can't afford "Obamacare" when it goes into effect this year so I will be penalized (taxed) because I fall into the cracks. The only reason I still have my sanity is because I'm counting down these last two years until my 2nd child graduates. Sigh.