Stats:

35 M, 185 lbs, 5’10 barefoot, 15-18 %BF, southeast asian (mixed half white)

I look like I lift. And I don’t smoke or drink and eat well.

I.e- tricep and bicep separation, capped shoulders, v-taper, and strong upper chest with meaty fore arms. I could lean out more and get more jaw definition. But I prefer to fill out my shirts.

Fwiw, I look 10-15 years younger bc of Asian genetics. But I tell everyone I’m my age.

Lifts: I lift almost everyday for about 12 years. Primarily focus on just consistency and use lifting as more of a cornerstone habit now than I did before which was to increase strength.

Bench- 265 1RM Squat- 2 plates Deadlift- 3 plates

Education and job: Masters in STEM I work in STEM field.

I make 105k from job and anywhere between 25k-35k with investments and side hustles.

Marital status: Kissless virgin pretty much. I don’t really get female attention so I don’t entertain the thoughts of being married.

Spiritual: Assurance of salvation: 10 , I believe Christ’s act of atonement for our sins and believe in Him as the Son of God.

I don’t go to church And I don’t do any evangelism I don’t memorize scripture. In other words I don’t have very good spiritual hygiene.

Body: I grew up in single mother household of a white mom. My dad did not speak very good English but he tried his best with whatever he could do to help me. But since they split early, I didn’t have a masculine influence.

So like most lost boys, I treated the internet as a surrogate father, learning wisdom and the path to a better future for myself that way. As a result I became the first college educated person in my family on both sides.

I’ve basically been working and developing my hobbies while staying away from the indulgences that trapped my other family members in a vicious cycle of addiction. All of my friends are guys and we tend to be on the nerdy side tbh. They are getting married off so I’m seeing my friend circle shrinking.

I tried going to church but I just never fit in. Idk why it’s uncomfortable for me. I guess it’s bc I don’t come from a Christian family.

I have attended groups before. But I usually go for a few months, listen to the message and linger for a little bit afterwords to talk to people. But not many people were interested in talking and although numbers were exchanged I don’t receive any invites. I’m not sure why but I guess it’s bc of my lack of common history with them, it’s unlikely I’m going to make good friends.

I have tried to start groups before in the past but I don’t get much attendance. Idk why but I have a feeling it’s hard for me to be charismatic and likeabke bc I don’t exactly have the traits for it. Usually the leaders are Caucasian and tall. And well I’m short and Asian lol. I’m not trying to draw pity, it’s just the red pill I have to accept. Typically Asians are seen as the beta imo.

Now I’m in a period of spiritual stagnancy and I don’t want to abandon my faith. And I know I don’t have it in me to go the opposite direction and live an indulgent life.

So I’m open to advice in what direction I could go.

Thanks for reading.