Once upon a time there was a girl named Lily. Lily was 7 and wanted, more than anything in the world, to become a serial killer. But Lily's mum and dad did not want her to become a killer, so they stripped off her clothes, dragged her to the bathroom, called her three brothers to the bathroom, and told them that "this is what happens to naughty little girls" as they held her head under water mixed with ammonia and other vile substances. The boys remained emotionless, and Lily's father demanded that they laugh at her. They should ridicule her nudity and the silly pathetic way she gasps for air. Then Lily's mum slammed Lily's head against the side of the bathtub as hard as she could and kept doing it. Everyone looked on as the water stained red with Lily's filthy blood. And then she stopped, and they all walked away leaving Lily on the bathroom floor.

But mum was scared that Lily might die, god forbid. So she wrapped Lily in plastic to prevent her blood from staining the carpet, and left her in her room for seven days and seven nights.

Seven years later, Lily was 14. Lily's daddy decides that Lily is too pretty -- too pretty with her cat-like eyes.

Pretty girls are dirty girls. Pretty girls are filthy. So while Lily was sleeping, he took a knife and carved a line from her right eye to the left corner of her cheek and a line straight down her left eye. He carved so hard that he had cut through her eye. As she screamed, he smiled relieved that his little girl will never be the object of some man's lust.

Lily's mum recalls the most horrid day of her life - the day Lily bled for the first time. She had done her best to starve Lily. She heard that girls who starved do not bleed. Furious, she swore to make her regret it. She called her husband into Lily's room, and he held her legs open while she impaled Lily with the knife.

Lilly's mum and dad were really angry with Lily. Lily wore a skirt that was two entire inches above her ankles. So Lily's dad said, "You slut! You're a bitch now? You can go eat like one too." So they might her eat garbarge on all fours in the corner of the kitchen. Nauseated by the smell, Lily vomited all over the floor. Furious, Lily's dad ordered her to "clean it up". And when Lily got up to get paper towels, he kicked grabbed her by her hair and pushed her as hard as he could at the kitchen cabinets. The doors of the cabinet splintered, and it made him even more angry. He said to her, "clean this up with your mouth. Eat every drop of vomit, or I'll cut off your fingers."

He left the kitchen for four hours and returned to see Lily crying. He was angry, so he took a butcher's knife from the drawers, held Lily's hand to the cutting board, and brought down the knife as hard as he could. And four of Lily's fingers came off in a swipe. Lily screamed in agony, and he ordered, "Eat it. Cook it and eat it. Or I'll kill you."

So one day. Lily decides that she has had enough. For fuck's sake, she's a killer. And killers take action.

So Lily cuts the blades out of a razor with a nailclipper, and she looks into the mirror. She hated her appearance - her one-eyed, gaunt, and slightly yellow skin fueled her hatred. She was a freak, and she knew it. She presses the blades into the tendon at her wrist. A little bit more pressure, a little bit more force. Cut it already. And she couldn't. She moves the blade to her upper forearm. And she swipes her hand down as fast as she could. At first nothing happened. The blade just left a pale crooked slit down her forearm. Then all of a sudden the slit turns a flowery red. Bright like the first of spring - a lovely red.

So Lily sits down on the bathroom floor, and stares at the cracks in the wallpaper and tries to turn them into words and pictures. A stick figure, a tree, the ocean.