In a continuation of our Back to Basics Series, we decided that it was time to revisit some of the rules of the sub. The rules have grown and been redefined over the years but the core reason they exist is to keep RPW, RPW.

Along with the wiki and theory posts, the rules exist to help us give solid, RPW advice to newcomers (and veterans). We want you all to have a firm understanding of both the what and the why. This will help us to help others achieve their goals.

Let’s dive in:

Rule Two:

All posts and comments must be in good faith.

All information you choose to give about yourself and your situation must be true.

Hypotheticals must be stated as such.

Requests must be made with the intent of useful advice, not sympathy, and advice must be given with the intent of helping the person requesting it.

You must be interested in participating in the community to contribute.

You cannot ask questions on behalf of others.

Stick around.

The takeaways of this rule are:

  • We aim to give advice to real women with real-life scenarios.

To be here, you have to either want to receive real advice or want to give real advice. We prefer not to waste everyone’s time discussing fake or faulty OPs. And yes, lying by omission is a problem, perhaps the biggest problem we encounter with this rule. Whatever you choose to reveal will be considered and scrutinized by members of the RPW community. We intend to give actionable and effective advice, and we cannot do that if an OP is not upfront and honest. Post history is fair game to anyone who wants to read it. We will allow, and sometimes request that OP update a post if there is a relevant piece of information missing.

All that said, if an OP understood all the facets to her problems, she probably wouldn't need our help. Sometimes "lies" are really "didn't know it was relevant". It's up to the RPW regulars to get at the truth of a situation and not assume the OP has given a fully balanced picture with complete information. This is Reddit after all!

  • Hypotheticals are allowed for discussion’s sake and must be noted as such.

Hypotheticals are a good way for RPWs to challenge and expand their understanding of RP theory. They often generate meaningful discussions from the community. However, it is important to state that they are hypotheticals, so that the RPW community doesn’t take it as real-life Field Reports or as fundamental RP theory. It is also important to be reasonable. There is a difference between thought-provoking hypotheticals that generate good discussion, and purposefully triggering hypotheticals that were asked with the intent to sow discord and fan the fire.

  • RPW is not for reassurance and sympathy. We champion the truth even if it is difficult, and we prioritize actionable advice over sweet platitudes.

We often get posts that are a long list of complaints about an OP’s SO, followed by something along the lines of “Am I being unreasonable here?” or “Do you think this is fair?” Even if unintended, these one-sided posts usually result in an outpouring of sympathy, moral support, and reassurances about how the poster is in the right while her SO is crazy, inconsiderate, or downright evil.

The thing is, reassurance does not resolve conflict between the OP and her SO. It does not give the rest of the RPW community any insights or strategies on how to handle similar problems in their own lives. The OP feels validated and given permission to continue without improvement. It feels good for members to get to act as righteous enforcers from behind a keyboard and without impact to their own lives. None of it helps the OP or the community to learn how to handle real-life situations.

RPW is not a place for us to rant and complain and badmouth our SOs or someone else's. It is for us to figure out actionable, effective paths to navigate our relationships. Posts that seek sympathy without asking for a way to resolve it are unproductive and will be removed. Likewise, comments that give validation without also providing actionable advice are similarly unproductive and get removed.

  • RPW is not a zoo.

RPW is for like-minded women to discuss topics and give actionable advice from a red-pill perspective. It is NOT for uninterested people who want to watch, study, poke, and prod the behaviors of women who think differently from themselves. It is also NOT for men to use to ask their own questions about female nature or why we are RPW (the rules for male participation on RPW will be expanded upon and revisited soon). These kinds of inquiries are a waste of our time. Similarly, people who concern troll as a way to undermine the red-pill perspective and people who aim to derail the sub’s purpose as a toolbox for women to use in their relationships will be shown the door.

  • You can only change yourself

We know you care about your blue-pilled sister/best friend/aunt/girlfriend/mother/coworker/second-cousin-twice-removed, but we cannot advise you on how to convert them to an RPW mindset. You are not her, and you have no control over her relationships and mindset. You know her best. If you cannot help her, then we cannot help her through you. You can send them to us and we will welcome them and advise them.

The second area where this rule applies is when women ask for advice on how to fix their SO. We have many strategies here to help YOU to change YOUR behavior to alter and better the dynamics of your relationship. We can show YOU how to better communicate your needs, to encourage your SO to accomplish his goals, to get out of the way so he can lead, or to be the best partner you can be.

What we cannot do is tell you how to change your SO. Remember - you can only change yourself.

If you ask advice for how to change him, we will advise you on how to change yourself. If we think your situation is at a dead end, we will advise you on how to move on. If you do not understand his behavior, we can explain men to you. If you continue to argue that you’ve done no wrong, we have no advice to give you. If you ask: why isn’t he different, we can tell you why, but we cannot tell you HOW to make him different.

Here at RPW, one of our main motivations lies with the fact that change originates with us. We cannot tell anyone how to change their SO. Posters and commenters alike who are intent on fixing the OP’s SO will be warned and removed accordingly. RPW is, at its core, a self-improvement sub - and you are here to make yourself a better woman so that it spreads to your relationship and your life.

  • Your posts are for you AND for the RPW community

If you post, you must stick around and actually participate in the comments. It is disrespectful to waste people’s time and leave them hanging after they have put in the effort to help you.

Likewise, it is not OK to get what you need from the community by asking advice and leaving comments, engaging a dozen plus members, then deleting the dang thread and all of your comments so nobody else can benefit from the discussion. I understand that throwaway accounts often post, delete, and disappear as quickly as they came, and there’s not much we can do about this. But if you are a regular participant of RPW who actively engages with us, this behavior is off-putting to the rest of the community.

Phew. That’s a long rule. But it’s a very necessary one. All of the facets of this rule are to prevent people from abusing RPW and the effort that the community puts into it for questionable, unproductive, or malicious motives. It helps us stay on track with the red-pill perspective and it keeps RPW as what it should be: a toolbox for women to use to better their relationships and lives. Again, newcomers and veterans alike are very encouraged to review this rule and report violations so that we can be the well-oiled RPW machine that we all love!