Summary Went no contact with narcissistic parents, broke up with fiancee, found TheRedPill. And I'm never looking back.

Warning: This will be long.

You guys have no idea how grateful I am that I found TheRedPill, or better yet, it found me. For context, I'm 27 and was regrettably a major beta bitch. Always been the "nice" guy, doing things for family, friends, supported my fiancée the past few years as she returned to school for nursing and have been in a LTR.

About 6 weeks ago, I went no contact with narcissistic/borderline parents (step-dad and mom). Upon graduating from college, I returned to my hometown to gain healthcare experience and worked to save up in order to achieve my goal of becoming a physician (I'll be attending medical school in a few weeks). I decided at the time to live with an aunt and uncle because I know my relationship with my parents is best kept at a healthy distance.

Fast forwarding to a few weeks ago, my step-dad calls me randomly out of the blue and attempts to blast me a new asshole. Screams at me on the phone for 30 minutes about what a shitty person I've been to them the past two years, how I use and abuse people, and how he had to stay up with my mother the past couple of nights since I make her so upset and have no consideration for anyone but myself (and my sister had to bring her flowers to make her feel better). Yes, my step-dad is the ULTIMATE enabling beta bitch. I came to the conclusion that his desire to lash out at me is due to a myriad of reasons: his son is a complete fuck up despite all of the resources his own father has invested in him (my step-brother was kicked out of college for drunkenly fighting a female cop and daddy bailed him out of jail, he almost overdosed on heroin in the past, etc), he is jealous of my successes due to my own hard work (both in terms of himself and for his son), and my parents have been in financial ruin for as long as I can remember due to fucked up emotional spending habits (ex. my sister won a $300k settlement in high school from a car accident- 5 years later all the money is gone and my sister and parents have nothing to show for it). So, being the beta bitch he is, he needed an outlet to vent his fat ass frustrations and he obviously isn't going to do that to his unicorn.

I responded to him by letting him continue his hysterics, and then I calmly replied that I didn't agree with anyone he claimed and I needed time to consider what he said. Haven't spoken to my mom or him since. To illustrate how embarrassing his beta tendencies are, here are some of the texts he sent me over the last few weeks. Two weeks after the initial phone call, it was my 27th birthday. This is what I received:

"It's your birthday! A great day to recognize the importance of your mother, from giving you life to loving you throughout your life as ONLY she can. A great day to reflect on the importance of that relationship and how non replaceable each and every minute of the at most 100 years we get to share on this planet is for each person. A great day to honor the person without whom one's existence simply would not be."

Honestly, how fucking hilarious is that? I received another text later that afternoon (for context, I have been on a shared family phone plan throughout college and was going to get my own account for med school. I was a bitch, I know. I texted my sister to get the verizon pin from my step-dad since I still wasn't talking to him and I received this: "After she receives the apology she is due, we can discuss other matters, including phone contracts. The above is more important that you have ever realized, "you only miss them when they are gone." Don't wait that long"

He's a clueless idiot because I went and got a different phone and he continued to pay for the line and had to cancel it himself when he found out. My step-dad is a very intelligent, narcissistic beta bitch provider that caters to my depressed/borderline mother at every opportunity. Fucking worships her. Together they are the perfect, twisted enabling couple that miserably hold on for dear life.

I happened to pick up No More Mr. Nice Guy at the perfect time and couldn't believe how much I had in common with everything that book preached. I sought a therapist and affirmed beliefs that I have long repressed about my "perfect" family: my parents were emotionally and psychologically abusive and I'm breaking free of the fucking system.

A few days after the split from my parents, I ended my relationship with my fiancee. To make a long story short, she was my perfect unicorn from college. I emotionally and financially supported her through nursing school, and I thought she was the mythical demigod I needed to worship. In retrospect, I'm fairly certain she's been fucking residents/interns for a while and I've been playing the supportive beta role. From VERY deep introspection these past 6 weeks, I've learned the degree to which my mother, disneyesque ideals, and feminism has affected me. I recognize the patterns I've searched for in previous relationships and the desire I've felt to not only want love, but NEED to have it due to my past conditioning.

My saving grace has been my few sane family members and this subreddit. I have been devouring every article and book I can get my hands on. I suppose I am in the anger phase due to my rage of attempting to appease my parents and ex-fiancee the past few years, but I am incredibly grateful I made it out of the cycle. I found The Manipulated Man interesting, No More Mr. Nice Guy somewhat frightening (due to the recognition of myself), and I just finished The Rational Male today. That was the most bitter pill to swallow yet.

I'm learning and I'm no longer afraid. Despite my wasted years, I can't wait for med school and the opportunities it will bring. I plan on building a fucking empire. Run my own business, spin plates (I'm done with the idea of marriage), and live my life with purpose and intent. I started rock climbing, I've always lifted, been learning more about mens fashion, and plan on starting some old hobbies again. I will become the man I've always wanted to be. And it's largely in part thanks to this community.

Lessons learned: I'm the fucking prize. I will live my life on my terms, with purpose and intent. This is the community of men I've always needed and I will pay it forward wherever and whenever I can.