Summary: How does one fully embrace abundance mentality? While in Monk mode right now, I discovered and pinpointed this obstacle I need to defeat and I need some pointers.

Body: A bit of an update on my situation. If anyone remembers from my white knight convert post, I have been working on unplugging myself from the Blue for a couple of months now. Monk mode has been good to me... All the work Ive been putting in these months is starting to show and I can see it. You guys are right: self- improvement has never been so satisfying and addicting as it is now. My knowledge component grows everyday by reading this sub and its Field Reports, I study some psychology courses online (positive psych +psychological first aid) and I read and do the exercises in Dr.Glovers "No more Mr.Nice guy", which is what some people here recommended. For the physical component, I lift 3-4 times a week and go rock climbing twice a week and I eat fairly well, so Im beginning to be very happy with my physique. All this is boosting my self confidence and Im loving it, but as the monk I strive to be right now, I know this isnt even close to the summit of the self-improvement mountain I am climbing. I truly accept, learn and analyze all the slips and falls I have on my "climb" and I get it... It is all part of the process of being unplugged. But there is one thing that is bothering me, brothers. I cant fully accept and embrace abundance mentality. Maybe I made a mistake by pursuing a plate in monk mode. Cause I feel like I lost frame with this plate and this is whats making me feel like a beta again. The issue with me (pre- discovering redpill and now that im striving to develop myself to have alpha traits) is that I feel most happiest when Im spinning A PLATE. When the girl walks out on me, I feel empty and even though I know its only a matter of time till I find another plate to spin, it kills me inside. This just leaves me demoralized and its not good for my development. Maybe I could fix this problem by attempting to spin multiple plates after I develop in monk mode that way, I will always have some broad around. But mainly what Im trying to ask here is, how can I practice abundance mentality the right way so I dont constantly feel like Im losing?

Lessons Learned:

1.Perhaps I shouldnt have gone after a plate in monk mode. I know I wanted to test my game with her, but she is being a distraction to me right now.

2.I need to strengthen my frame.

3.I need to learn abundance mentality and learn to let go of people.