So a friend and i wanted to move to a city after we had a vacation here. We really enjoyed the city and the whole living here so much that both of us made plans to move here as we are equally frustrasted with the small towns we live in. Your life changes a lot just by picking a bigger city, you get more options, more life, more culture without the drama of a small town. If you like to live in small town thats perfectly fine but i think anyone should move at least once to a bigger city. Apart from that the rents in the new city were cheaper, basically it was a win/win. Theres a shit ton of art going on here, when you open an app you cant possibly to all of that crazy stuff and thats pretty epic. New restaurants opening almost everywhere.

We met his ex girlfriend two times on accident while we were traveling. It wasnt a big issue but i could see how manipulative she was right away. It made me realize how foolish most people pick their partners because all she sheemed to want in the short convo was to make him jealous of the "new life" she had. I knew he blocked her because she stalked him.

I told him wed possibly dont meet her again and he should just focus on himself. I liked his spirit and his energy when he was solo. Sure he seemed damaged from the past relation, we all know how men feel when something ends bitter, but there was this will and the trust in something better for the future. It bringts out the best in people and i didnt know what would come.

The time when we were back really motivated me to make a move because it was simply eye opening how much different life in the old city is. Theres not a lot of music going on (i am a good musician) and thats too why we didnt tell any of the old friends about it so no one would hold us back. It felt pretty epic and sort of "bromanceish" if you will. Two guys with the same mission and we didnt really hype each other so i trusted his decision more.

In the meantime however, he got a new girlfriend. He said "he feels so good now and its better to be with her its all so easy" - to me it sounded like nothing but a bandaid and shes not really on his level of SMV as he is hyper sexy for a guy at his age. Naturally ripped and strong. But all of that is not worth a lot without the right mind. I sensed a red flag right away.

So i came down here again, he did too. We booked an apartment for a week, did not find a place that was good enough. I have experience in real estate and i could see the tricks some women would try on us to make us "buying" the lies. So he really wanted one apartment and i thought it was fishy, so i went there once again to check it out and it turns out my instinct was right. As im allergic, im really looking for something clean. I simply wont move into a water damaged building. Most people just hide the flaws or try to make it look good. Maybe some of you share the same exeperience. Never live in a water damaged building.

He was desperate and i said its fine but i wont move into a bad building and apart from that the location is pretty bad. I told him it would be wiser to continue searching because we have a lot of other offers so why jump for the first apartment. Before that he would agree on my idea of picking a clean place. He changed his mind and said "i just dont care anymore, its up to you now if you say its okay we move it."

He had to go back because he had to finish his old job at the old town. I kept staying here and looking for options. I messaged him that he needs to come back because most people wanna see him before they would sign anything. Apart from that, in the time off you can enjoy the life here so in my mind its a no brainer. So from here it gets pretty weird. I woud plan one week ahead where we might stay and when he will join. He said he will come "when i have an appointment". I saw here he would put most of the work on me with the excuse that he has to work. Okay so you cant make a short call when you have a break? Or call them on your day off? He however sent some emails.

It seemed like he was busy - in my mind i didnt have the girlfriend in mind. I recalled all the BP fantasies he would text me about the "new special girl" and that gave me an idea that he might be hanging around with her, afraid of making a move because he just got into a relation with her. Now who the fuck would get into a new relation with someone in his old city - when you want to move away? In my opinion someone with a BP mind. Whats the deal about not telling anyone, when you have an LTR that will push buttons to make you stay?

I knew in my mind she pushed his buttons. She gives him more sex, more validation, more pleasure so "staying" isnt a painful as in the past. She knows this. She knows that when she pulls all the strings at once now, he might stay and be "happy" with her.

So wednesday he gos to party after the job is over and has a hangover next day. I think "great" so he could come the next day. Next day hes hungover and sick, im busy with apartments. One would be pretty good, i send him a video. He wanted to come on friday, messages me at 11pm that he slept too late (usually not his style) and cant make it. In my mind he maybe just was staying at his new girl, having sex and waking up way too late. So he missed the opportunities to get here in time. I had a friend where he could stay till monday and he said "he does not want that he wants his own place" but doesnt find on. I suggest he should just drive with his car now and he replies with "not enough appointments" - i make 2 new ones in 5 fucking minutes because im good on the phone... Tell him we have now three and he says "its too expensive with the car and i start a new job on tuesday" - i tell him because as its an internet job and the video thing is easy from home that he could here go to the libary for a week or we just rent the old apartment we had for a week with fast wifi. He said no he wants to be home when he does that. And he didnt give me another date when he would join me. Yeah just find something and ill sign it he said.

Why all the effort you might ask... Well its much easier to find a place with two people. You get three times the results. Apart from that im prett stubborn. But then i realize that he seems to be under the spell of the new woman and how much i am under the spell of "bromance" - his new girl is the perfect band aid for the old miserable life he hates so much. The perfect bule pill. For now it makes everything better for him. And that takes away the edge to grind it, to make it happen.

I tell him that i find it fucked up that he leaves me hanging and that its not crazy its just 6 fucking hours with the car. He said yeah he runs "out of time" and cant make it. I dont buy it. I tell him thats all fucked up and that i will keep looking for myself. He says he "still wants to go there" but no sorry, nothing. No real answer to my question why he didnt already come on thursday apart from "he felt sick and fucked up".

If i was his girlfriend im pretty sure he would have taken the car no matter what. But as i dont own a golden vagina my butthole wouldnt do the job i guess. I think being a super good friend isnt enough for a BP personality. Back on the first vacation he seemd pretty alpha but i started to see the cracks more and more. Ive seen this many times. You can be a good friend with boundaries but it aint good enough for the BP men.

He later sends me offers and tells me to go there alone without him "he in no matter the apartment" - i tell him that i feel unmotivated to do that now, he goes on paying me half of the taxi cab if i go there... I just said no. I told him if he wants to go here, come up here and do it like we agreed, together and that its not good anyway if i only show up alone... not evening whining about how exhausting and taxing it is to do it partly alone already but that was okay because i thought he would just come by. In my mind im like come on, wake the fuck up dude.

Then he seemed pissed and now doesnt talk to me now at all anymore. All because im not in for the bullshit. I know hes a reliable person, normally. But with the new girlfriend he seems fucking off. I put myself through a ton of crap and im not willing to settle for less. Its one of these moments where you feel kind of bad about the friendship but on the other hand you just cant do it because your gut tells you: just dont.

Sure moving alone to another city seems pretty fucking scary to most people.

Im glad i didnt waste too much time here, already made some friends here and got to know the town a lot better. It feels pretty good. I also see that i partly get too involved with people who are not good for me, the brocode simply wont work in todays society anymore. Hamsters gotta hamster.

I will keep going my own way. Cheers.