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Borjatone
[–]thereticle4 points 11 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
This is not a terrible article but your writing style is very young and your ideas are very much surface material.
I'm not trying to shit on you because it seems to me that you're quite young, and there's nothing wrong with that. I think it only becomes a problem if you try and make yourself out to be an authority when its clear that you're nowhere near that point yet.
For example, based on what I have read in your post and linked article there is no way that I would say you are qualified enough to write a book, and I definitely wouldn't read it. That doesn't mean you shouldn't write it, in fact I would strongly recommend that you do write it because it will be a great experience for you. Just don't market it as a cutting edge exposition of TRP theory, because it won't be, and you're guaranteed to get shit on.
[–]Borjatone[S] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks for the feedback mate. It's a work in progress so hopefully it won't get 'shit on'.
Definitely not trying to be an authority on anything, just a somewhat experienced guy sharing ideas. No need for them to be cutting edge, I'm not going to reinvent the wheel and all that.
[–]thereticle2 points 11 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
No worries. Best of luck with your project.
[–]AtillaTheTough 1 points1 points1 points 11 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
"As simple humans..." You lost me from the get go. I can't exactly put my finger on what it is but your writing seems pretty superficial.
Your comparison of finding the one in love and finding the one with jobs was kind of strange.
How would you react to comments such as “Yeah, I got laid off but I’m not worried because that job wasn’t the one” or “I won the lottery, but I’m not going to leave my tiny studio because it’s the one”?
Supposedly you think we would react with: That's bullshit. To me it makes sense though. I wouldn't mind being laid off from some job as much as I would be from my dream job for example.
Let’s play with numbers (I deeply dislike maths, but whatever)
Why mention your feelings about math here? It wouldn't hurt to use actual statistics when talking about how many women in the dating pool there are/can possibly be. They're not hard to get.
You say there are no special snowflakes and you're right about that but you don't go in depth in explaining why. Your argument seems to be that there are no special snowflakes because there are plenty of fish in the sea. Also this is a very short article.
Short article, deep dislike of maths, writing out basic trp ideas without providing well thought out arguments all make me think you're in high school right now.
[–]Borjatone[S] -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
27, Director of a school, masters degree. I hope you don't run game using assumption stacking as your main tool ;)
The text is just a piece of the puzzle and probably feels a bit disconnected without the rest of what I'm writing. I agree some parts will need crunching more accurate numbers instead of estimating, and certain ideas will have to be explained more in depth. You've got a point there.
And this is why I've come to you guys for feedback, all of this input will make me improve the quality of my material.
Thanks for taking a few minutes to read and comment.
[–]AtillaTheTough 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well seems like they give master's degrees to anyone these days :D Just fucking with you mate. I do assume bitches want my dick though.
EDIT: Most of the reason I disliked you saying you deeply disliked maths was that you're showing off your weakness in a sense.
[–]∞ Mod | TRP Vanguardbsutansalt 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Removed. Reply to this comment once your thread meets the following standard:
https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3a0135/announcement_new_thread_requirements/
This thread is an excellent example of how threads should now be strutured:
/r/TheRedPill/comments/3a0ggu/the_average_american_woman_now_weighs_as_much_as/
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[–]thereticle4 points [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Borjatone[S] 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]thereticle2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]AtillaTheTough 1 points1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Borjatone[S] -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AtillaTheTough 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]∞ Mod | TRP Vanguardbsutansalt 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link