Different Look at Oneitis and Alpha Widowed plus my gems

DaBaulz · 2017-03-19T18:34:22+00:00

I have to agree with screening. But I also have to disagree with the antimarriage sentiment. A man in control can be well served by marriage with the right woman, and I think it is foolish to promote a philosophy that totally disregards the importance of building a family to the human experience. I have seen a fair share of divorce rapes, and agree there are lessons to be learned to avoid this. But avoiding LTR's completely is not the answer.

There is a pendulum here, and life is best outside of the extremes. The world is full of men who are looking for validation, who instantly offer commitment in exchange for NOTHING and next thing you know they are married to a psycho in a totally unfair relationship. They get divorce raped and advocate against anyone marrying. But that is their experience from that side of the pendulum.

I know of men who met girls, and stayed casual. Who multiple women had to BEG to be allowed to be their gf, all while the guy was shopping around publicly with her friends. I know of men whose GFs had to go through YEARS or catering to their mens needs to be lucky enough to get married. Men who made it clear they could leave the marriage on a moments notice, and do just as well or better. Whose wives continue to look up to them as the source of their happiness, whose wives fear being left not for monetary reasons but that they feel they would be lost without their captain. I know of men who were so RP when they were healthy, and who were so good at screening QUALITY women, that when unhealth hit they had a full time worker and nurse who cared for them like a loyal soulmate in their time of need. Most (not all but most) this talk about backstabbing, unloyal wives comes from bluepill men who did NO SCREENING, NEVER took charge, NEVER established the right frame, and got the rewards that they built (e.g. being screwed over).

If you are of the first type of man, sure you should never get married. But isn't the whole point of being redpill to become the second type of man? An alpha man who is RP has nothing to fear from marriage, it is the bluepill man who will get used, but that bluepill man will be used in the single life too.

I have been consistently a high value alpha male in my life (38 yo) and I have been severely burned by oneitis. I have been the needy beta man in some relationships, it can happen to us all. I am definitely glad I didn't marry that one lol. I would say that marriage is dangerous, and you should really know your girl, and it can only succeed if you are indisputably in control of the relationship.

RunawayGrain · 2017-03-20T02:23:18+00:00

Delayed marriages and resulting high-notch women were fairly rare in my day.

We're about the same age. I'd say that most of my classmates from high school got hitched under a year after graduation. Almost none of them are still married to the same partner. Hell, some of the girls seem to remodel the house and the husband with the same frequency.

is how to keep your damn heart from committing.

I think what did it for me, other than my crazy ex, is hitting up my ten year reunion. Maybe one girl was still physically fit, the rest had their asses go off like airbags. None of them were emotionally fit, though. Maybe half were in the middle of nasty divorces, the other half were popping anti-depressants like tic-tacs. Fuck committing to that.

Title	Different Look at Oneitis and Alpha Widowed plus my gems
Author	OldGuyRedux
Upvotes	2
Comments	3
Date	March 19, 2017 5:49 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/60bbuc/different_look_at_oneitis_and_alpha_widowed_plus/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/different-look-at-oneitis-and-alpha-widowed-plus.41895 https://theredarchive.com/post/41895

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