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[–]MasterUm 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I find your story to be a bit banal (single mom full of red flags, who even cares, you got your sex, you didn't get married, you discovered the pill, congratulations, next), but I like your simple yet passionate writing style.
One thing I noticed is the mate guarding that you write at length on. Repeat after me: "It is not my bicycle, it is just my turn." If you feel yourself sucked into the negative emotion-powered vortex of mate guarding, consider running intentional and rational dread game instead.
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I never heard of it put that way:
the negative emotion-powered vortex of mate guarding
This explains abundance mentality so you don't try to hold on needlessly.
I didn't want to lose my bicycle ride because I wasn't done yet. Dread game was the only tactic that started to restore my sanity.
Thank you!
[–]MasterUm 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Let me try and put into words this vortex that I have observed all-too-often: man's self-confidence drops for some reason, a man has a suspicion that the woman is not loyal, man (overtly!) comes forward with accusations, woman talks her way out of it, man again/still has a suspicion, man tries (overtly!) to introduce new rules to reinstate his position, woman obviously ignores/circumvents the new rules since he has already lost respect, he looses some more confidence, repeat.
I didn't want to lose my bicycle ride because I wasn't done yet.
Totally. Still, to the best of my understanding in modern US circumstances mate guarding will simply not work.
Dread game was the only tactic that started to restore my sanity.
You did not mention anything that sounds like a dread game to me. Obviously lifting/finding a job is a covert dread (which is the best dread) if handled correctly.
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
oh my god. thank you. I read your 1st paragraph and it hit me. That's exactly what happened.
By dread game, I meant walking away. Once I started to do that, her reaction was quick. She did not want to lose her provider and her behavior changed.
I remember reading one fellow's story here where he got involved with a beautiful Asian girl. He was practically homeless but she took him in while he got back on his feet. It was only after he got his confidence back that he found out she was not the person he thought she was. When he left, she went ballistic. I'm experiencing that here. Since walking away, she's lost weight, anxiety, panic attacks. Part of me feels bad but the part of me that sees the game doesn't care. She doesn't feel bad she lost me, she feels bad her game didn't work.
[–]NeoreactionSafe 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
In Mexico, when she walked out of the bedroom with her bathing suit on, I couldn't believe it was smaller than her underwear... which I thought was impossible to do. So good blue pill me had a hard time handling my nearly-naked girlfriend on the beach. She was having trouble being on birth control - as in she has a hard time getting wet "anymore" (i.e. I'm her BB not her AF).
In Mexico, when she walked out of the bedroom with her bathing suit on, I couldn't believe it was smaller than her underwear... which I thought was impossible to do. So good blue pill me had a hard time handling my nearly-naked girlfriend on the beach.
She was having trouble being on birth control - as in she has a hard time getting wet "anymore" (i.e. I'm her BB not her AF).
Honestly I skimmed this post, but it was just so, so sad.
I had a Ukrainian girlfriend once and she was so into sex it was hard to describe, she would be dripping wet with my just hinting at going at it.
And having a hot chick at the beach wouldn't be a negative if you knew she was getting horny while your eyes looked at her.
A very difficult thing to read... but at least we see what really was happening.
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. If I felt desired, it would be OK. But knowing how impulsive she is, I think she has to have the ONS or cheap thrill to get excited anymore. It hurts but at least I see what it is and don't take it personally (anymore).
[–]NeoreactionSafe 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
All women desire is a man who can play a Game called "I'm your daddy".
Seriously.
If you give off fatherly vibes women love it because they want to please father figures. These days there is a lot of anger in women (thanks to Feminism) so you have to absorb some insane Shit Tests first, but once you get past that and start to play "daddy" they will be either the good girl or bad girl you want.
Men lead, women follow.
It just sounds like you were in deep sorrows and hoping to be "saved", but women really aren't into that role.
Does a daughter want to "save" her father?
No.
Only fellow men will be there when you are down and then only if you have earned it over the years.
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Only fellow men will be there when you are down
This is why I appreciate TRP
[–]TheMGhandi 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Her body tricked you into accepting quite a bit and I'm glad to see how you gradually started to gain power in your relationship.
If you want a Ltr, look at the girl's parents. Even if the father's whipped, a wise mother is enough. Anything else is a waste of time. It's similar to drinking out of a broken glass you want to fix, or using a regular cup. The latter is much easier AND it won't cut you.
Thank you. She has good parents and a good mom. I think her curse is being in this country by herself trying to make things happen without her parents local. Makes for too much free-wheeling.
[–]TheMGhandi 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I think her curse is being in this country by herself trying to make things happen without her parents local...to dump her son onto.
The fact that she needs her parents to prevent free-wheeling is the largest red flag of them all.
Use this hot piece of ass, to get more ass. Why she's anything more than a plate, is beyond me.
And lastly, the oneitis is killing you...killing you man. Pay off some pretty, young escort and maybe you'll be cured.
the oneitis is killing you
Story of my life. My life didn't make much sense until I found TRP.
Now, I'm free. Thank you!
[–]Pietokles2 points 10 years ago* [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
"I wear it for you!"
I had to laugh so hard. Reminds me of an old LTR. She never dressed up for me but always for "others". I complimented her passive aggressively for her dress and every time she said:"I wear it for you!"
//edit: Despite different cultures, languages and nations we share the same experiences.
Oh geez. I am not alone! Thank you for sharing. I'm thankful for TRP and everyone that contributes. Also, that was a former LTR, that says something too :)
[–]permashred 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Where's the fucking revenge??? I love me some TRP revenge porn.
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Well... when she came back to "tell me her story"... I told her that if she wanted a relationship, then I needed to have 2 other girls on the side or to have one 20yo with us on occasion. She said, "That's not fair, does that mean I get to have someone else on the side too?".. I said, "Nope! Life isn't fair. You want emotional intimacy and I want sex and experience. I'll give you all the sex you want and a relationship, but I want a regular threesome".... She didn't walk out on me and looked at me quizzically. If it worked, I'll let you know :)
[–]SleezeusChrist 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Bro, no. Run as fast as you can, you are playing with a fire you probably can't contain.
Agreed. I see her as a gypsy. She'll continue to roam from guy to guy and use her charm to extract as many resources as possible - then move on when the well dries up or her game is discovered. There is no containing it.
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[–]MasterUm 2 points3 points4 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MasterUm 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]NeoreactionSafe 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]NeoreactionSafe 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheMGhandi 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheMGhandi 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Pietokles2 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]permashred 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]SleezeusChrist 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed Contributorsqerl[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link