TL;DR: Made a move on a girl that had cheated on her boyfriend with me a few years ago and got rejected, but made my intentions clear and didn't waste any substantial amount of my time in her orbit.

So I've known this girl for almost 2 1/2 years, let's call her K. K is a co-worker of mine (I work in a very insulated team and the risk to my career is low, though admittedly I should be looking elsewhere for women). She has had a bf for as long as I've known her, up until about a month ago. I made a move on her in late 2013 when we were both at a club on E, which ended up leading to her coming over to my place over the next 2 months leading up to her eventually cheating on her bf with me (she had to tell me to fuck her, BP me had never had sex while sober before). Still not sure how it happened- this was about a month before I discovered TRP and was beta as fuck, telling her about my feelings and shit. I also wasn't as jacked as I am now. Right place, right time, right feels I guess.

Something broke between K and I a couple months later (early 2014) from when we had sex. I got drunk and made a move on her at a party with a bunch of co-workers, and then got mad (lost frame) when she rebuffed my efforts and made a fool of myself. The social perception of her far outweighed whatever sexual desires she had toward me, but I was about 2 weeks into my RP journey and was well into the anger phase and didn't quite grasp discretion. Also, I vaguely recall she was trying to "make things right" with her bf around that time.

Hung out with K maybe 6-7 times after that between then and now for various reasons, in a strictly friends capacity, though most of these were initiated by her and not me, and other people were around in pretty much all of those situations. K had gained a considerable amount of weight during this period, and I didn't actually find her attractive enough to where I'd want to fuck her. Hence, minimal contact on either of our parts.

About a month ago, K's boyfriend broke up with her. She started talking to me and mentioned that she was on Tinder and that she was looking for sex. Understand that most of these conversations were her vomiting out a lot of crap about her life (on our company GChat), and me giving very minimalist responses- one of the things she told me was that her period had just happened- didn't really care at the time, but now seems slightly relevant since I started reading the importance of ovulation cycles in Preventative Medicine.

K has dropped a considerable amount of weight and is now back on the "fuckable" side of my scale. She's talking about wanting sex, she's single, I've fucked her once already, I figured, "Why not try?" Last night, I went over to her place to "hang out" with the intention of initiating sex. 2 minutes after we get in, she takes off her pants and is basically just wearing athletic underwear. I tease her and am touching her (in a way most would find inappropriate between friends), but the topic of our conversation eventually turns to some guy she met on Tinder (but hasn't fucked, though she told me she would fuck him if the situation arose- she was saying how he seems like good relationship material). The old blue me would've sat there and listened to her go on about him, but I instead thought "Fuck it, rejection is better than regret, and it's sure as hell better than sitting here listening to her talk about shit I couldn't care less about," and I made a move on her. And you know what? I wasn't all that surprised that she rejected me ("We're co-workers!", "You're fucking other girls!" were the reasons she listed of why not). I suspect I might've lost that favor in her mind forever when I lost frame a few years ago, which is why we stopped really talking in the first place. She offered to give me a ride home, but I said, "I'll walk, thanks," and excused myself.

At the end of the day, she's right- I have a couple of plates I'm currently spinning, but she looks good now, is single, and I figured since we've already fucked, it would be an easy opportunity. I'm reading Rollo's Preventative Medicine right now, and it claims that women are horniest/seek alpha characteristics most before ovulation (period) and beta characteristics after. I think it's a hamster-tastic cop-out to claim she rejected me because of her ovulatory phase, but it's definitely something to consider. If she gets horny in a few weeks and wants to hit me up for sex, great.

In the meantime, she's going to try to act like we're friends (IE, I'm her emotional tampon/good orbiter listener), and I will decline to respond. If she asks, I'll tell her that I'm not interested in being friends, simple as that. I could honestly care less if I talk to her again, and would only do so if it was abundantly clear that it was going to be sexual.

Lessons Learned:

  • Just because you fucked her once doesn't mean it's a sure thing in the future- priorities and perception change, and women are excellent at pretending the past didn't happen if they don't like how it fits their present narrative

  • Women will waste your time if you let them. You can be jacked, speak with a deep voice, and escalate with them physically, and they will still act oblivious and start trying to talk to you like you're a gay BFF- make your intentions clear quickly so your time isn't wasted

  • Ovulation cycles affect what a woman wants in the moment. K told me her girlfriends were telling her to "have fun and fuck around," but she said she was looking for something more serious/long-term. Since she just had her period, makes sense. Then again she could've been feeding me a line- actions, not words, right?

  • Don't be friends with a girl you want to fuck. It's pathetic. She gets what she wants by using you to vent/emotional tampon, and you don't get what you want (sex). Make your intentions clear and either succeed or fail, quickly. When you realize there are some girls that will fuck you in less than 2 hours of meeting them, you start to quickly lose patience with those who want to make you wait longer than that (Virgin Unicorns™ are of course exempt)