Summary: An assumption today, an inane mindless decision can easily change the tack of your life. There is a time and place to trust your gut – it is not the workplace.

Background/Context: I am a young professional who has been fortunate in the opportunities I have been given. My family is wealthy, I received a good education and I am now working at a big 3 consulting firm in the US. I am a remote employee (from home) while I am not working on client site (I am on site working 6/10 weeks for work). This was a choice I made during hiring, I wanted to be close to my brother as he is still in high school and I have grown to regret this decision. I recently had a conversation with my father about my career direction and my regret for not choosing to work from a large office location such as Manhattan.

Body: I am still a relatively new employee, a 2015 college graduate. There are other consultants remotely located in my area, one other new college hire, and a number of mid-thirties or older consultants. I am well acquainted with the other consultant my age, friends even, but it is clear that our career aspirations are quite different. He enjoys the rather, lackadaisical style of remote work, while it frankly drives me insane. I want to be doing things, bettering myself. I spoke with my father about the situation (this is paraphrased):

Father: So I come to take it you are regretting your decision to work where you are now?

Me: Yeah, I kind of wish I was in a more structured environment when I wasn’t on client site. Don’t get me wrong the travel is great but working here is just hard, I feel like I could benefit from a superior being right next to me in an office.

Father: Have you considered asking them to just move you? Why don’t you call a manager in the office you would like to move to and talk to him?

Me: Wouldn’t that be going behind my own managers back? I am still a new employee, why wouldn’t they just fire me if I was being so needy.

Father: Son you are making the most common mistake in the business world – you are assuming things that you know nothing about. You are aware of the positions I have held in consulting firms like the one you find yourself in now?

Me: Yes

Father: Well, from a management point of view at a consulting firm – you – the employee are the asset. You, your time, is the product being sold to the clients you are working with. Do you know how much money your company just spent training you?

Me: I lot I guess

Father: Yes, with the cost that they can bill you at now, the #1 priority is selling you and keeping you on board. I guarantee that if you pick up the phone and call your boss he will be fine with moving you to another city. Furthermore, you see how much I work. As a boss I’m busy with my own shit. You probably think that maybe it crosses my mind how the work of my employees is going or what their situation is? Think again, I am on calls all day. And when I am done I have my own problems to attend to and if I happen to have time for relaxation by-golly that’s why I am going to do. Your boss has his own problems too, he doesn’t give a fuck about what you are thinking about after work, but the thing is your problem is an easy one for him to solve, its one email, two minutes.

Me: I guess I never really thought about it from that perspective.

Father: Some of my biggest losses I have seen have been from people making stupid assumptions because they are afraid they will bother their bosses by asking a simple question. For instance one company I was at lost hundreds of millions and tons of people lost their jobs all because one guy that they brought in as a manger was too stupid to ask his boss a simple question about filling in accounting reports because he wanted to appear competent. Son I am the CEO of my company and I ask my employees questions all fucking day, do you think for a second that they think I am incompetent? No, I’m just being practical. Don’t assume things anymore, that isn’t how you get ahead in life. Just ask. It’s easy and even if you think it makes you look weak – know that it doesn’t.

This conversation took place a couple weeks ago now. I picked up the phone and spoke with a manager at the city which I wanted to be relocated to and lo-and-behold my dad was right. They were actually eager to move me and they even paid off the remaining months on my lease so that I could move painlessly.

Lessons Learned: What I want to convey here is that you shouldn’t make a choice based only on your own model of the universe. Ask, don’t make assumptions, and get the facts before you make choices. What seems like an obvious choice today could be crippling in the future. Heck I almost went on being unfulfilled by my job because I thought I would piss someone off while the reality of the situation was that my company was thrilled to move me.

TLDR: You don’t know shit. Operate off of the truth, not what you believe.

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